Surgery: It’s Now Time to Get Something Off My Chest.
Surgery: It’s Now Time to Get Something Off My Chest.
(Cancerventures Book Excerpt)
After another nervous car ride, we arrived at the hospital and checked in. We were seated in the waiting area. There was a large television on, describing the day’s weather and news; I couldn’t concentrate. I guess we had weather and news. I was a little preoccupied.
Please don’t talk to me about current events today.
Once I was taken into the hospital prep areas, fortunately, things clipped along quite efficiently. I was weighed and shown a bathroom. I had to provide a urine sample to make sure I wasn’t pregnant. I took a last look in the bathroom mirror as this version of me. I would no longer see these breasts. I quickly prayed, “Father, into your hands, I commit my spirit.” (And the rest of me).
I walked to the exam/prep room and was given something resembling ashower cap to put over my bun-wrapped hair. I was also given two light blue gowns to change into. One was an ocean blue tissue paper gown opening in the front; another blue tissue paper gown was to go on top of that one.
Okay, everyone, put me in a gift bag already!
They gave me grey hospital socks with white treads and smiley faces marked on them. I also put on leg massagers to prevent blood clots. My “civilian clothes” were stuffed in a bag that would be waiting in my hospital room after my surgery. (Hubby) was brought in to hang out with me.
A wonderful blonde nurse, in charge of my IV, came in next. I explained my vein saga and thankfully, she got the IV with the first try. I love her.
The anesthesiologist came in. I was hooked up to the drips and I asked him when I’d be feeling their effects. I have no memory after that. (Hubby) told me he kissed me before they wheeled me off. He could have drawn a Sharpie mustache on my face, and I wouldn’t have known for as out of it as I was.
The next thing I remember was waking up, probably around 3-4ish; Dr. M.’s face was there. My blurry surgeon proceeded to tell me an enlarged lymph node was found and removed.
The wakeup fun continues…
Amazon.com: Cancerventures: Tales of a Diagnosed Woman eBook : Cruse, Sheryle: Kindle Store
Purpose (“Hello, Gentlemen…”)
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.”
Proverbs 13:12
When you and I think of prisoners, do we see purpose in their lives?
Or do we write them off as hopeless and pointless?
(“Hello, Gentlemen…” Book Excerpt)
You wanted to see it happen. And you felt like it didn’t.
Maybe, the exact opposite showed up, contributing, even, to you being “in here.”
“Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off.”
Proverbs 23:18
You may be feeling NONE of that now.
Bitterness, cynicism, guilt, and shame may be the only things occupying your thoughts right now.
Maybe you think that things like hope, faith, a future and a purpose will work for other people, but not you.
You are “too hopeless,” You blew your chance.
You’re “in here.” Your life is over.
And, to that, I say…
“It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.”
Isaiah 55:11
This isn’t about a bunch of “thee’s” and “thou’s.”
This has to do with What He decided and said about you.
“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with Elohim, and the Word was Elohim.”
John 1:1
Have you ever heard about how Our Savior, Yahshua, IS The Word?
He was the intentional plan for you all along.
The Most High knew that you needed a Savior.
He knew about the circumstances that would bring you to a place of desolation, to your place of prison: a literal place of prison, as well as a prison of your mind, heart, body, and life.
A prison of issues.
He knew you would need rescue.
“Blessed be The Most High and Father of our (Master Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Lord Jesus Christ! According to His great mercy, He has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of (Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Jesus Christ from the dead.”
1 Peter 1:3
So, Yahshua…
“Remember those in prison as if you were bound with them, and those who are mistreated as if you were suffering with them.”
Hebrews 13:3
Amazon.com: "Hello Gentlemen...": 9798259016163: Cruse, Sheryle: Books
Financial Abuse? (“Just Violated?”)
Violation and abuse can often come through money.
Have you experienced that?
Have you experienced someone else controlling what you can and cannot do, who you can and cannot be, all through the means of money?
It is abusive. It is harmful.
Yes, it IS that bad.
And The Most High sees what you have gone through.
He does not minimize any of your pain.
Turn to Him, asking for healing from it today.
He wants to heal you and help you.
(“Money answers all things.”
Ecclesiastes 10:19)
Financial Abuse (“Just Violated?” Book Excerpt)
…Financial abuse is abuse. It is violation. It is violent. And it is possible that it can be a byproduct of rape.
But it gets a “just” minimization because there is no bruise, no broken arm, no busted lip.
It is “not that bad.”
“Just” a budget.
“Running the household.”
“The Breadwinner.”
“Traditional.”
But my experience? It felt darker and more violent than that.
I do not think that it was “just” my imagination.
Violation, in accepted subtlety.
“Entitled” to do so.
Controlling and doling out money.
I am about four years old. I’m wearing striped pants, sitting on my mother’s lap. It was probably Christmas. Each of us are holding crisp one-hundred-dollar bills, pinching them in between our thumbs and forefingers.
“Showing them off.”
Smiling for the camera. We look happy.
We were not.
He made the money. He controlled the money. We were dependent upon him.
That was by design.
Each birthday and Christmas, that was the gift: money. Hundred-dollar bills.
And then, the “special occasions or needs,” the grocery and the shopping trips. All requiring we go to him, asking… or begging… for money.
If he was more benevolent that day, it was just the humiliation of having to ask him for money.
If he was NOT benevolent, then, it was rage. Getting screamed at, told we didn’t need to waste money on “that thing,” and not getting any funds.
Instead, we received a three-to-four-day stretch of his rage/silent treatment/chaos/abuse.
What They Taught; What We Learned…
He, again, taught us that he ruled with fear, cruelty, oppressive rules, and chaos.
Money was dangerous, as it only came through him.
He determined that we were at his mercy. He determined that he decided we were unworthy of money. He determined that only he could execute whatever he decided to do with it.
He was in control. We were not…
What was it that I was born into? What was it that I endured?
What WAS I “a product of?”
Rape? Abuse? Violence?
(“Just”) Violation?
Amazon.com: (“Just”) Violated?
Making Biscuits?
“When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.”
1 Corinthians 13:11
If you are a cat lover, like me, you are probably aware of the feline behavior, “milk treading,” or “making biscuits.”
When kittens nurse, they “knead” their paws (and their tiny claws) into their mother’s body, in any effort to access milk. They often purr, in contentment, an audible signal that they are getting their needs met.
As kittens grow, many of them never outgrow this behavior. Even adult cats still practice “making biscuits,” often turning their attention to blankets and their human guardians…us.
Each time they do this, it is a time of blissful nostalgia. They revert to the happiness they experienced as those nursing kittens.
It is the feline equivalent of sucking your thumb, I suppose.
My household has been getting a lot of this kitty thumb-sucking.
Last spring, we adopted two kittens, Sacred Sophia Loren (Because of her exquisite lined, Show-like eyes), and Holy Ingenue.
Each feline has their own personality traits and quirks. Like people, some are introverts; some are extroverts.
Sophia, therefore, was our introvert. She hid, was nervous, and took longer to warm up to us.
But there WAS a moment that the light switch turned on. And it involved “making biscuits.”
It was still somewhat chilly weather. Therefore, yes, fully-grown adult me lounged in my adult flannel “onesie.” An adult, wearing footed pajamas.
I sat on the couch, with the kittens getting used to us and to our home, sniffing, being curious.
Nothing earth-shattering about that.
Enter “making biscuits.”
I have photographic evidence.
Behold:
Sophia’s curiosity overrode her fear. She sniffed my onesie, batted it with a paw.
And then she climbed into my lap.
And immediately, something switched on.
She rotated on the flannel. I detected a soft purr. And then, she started “making biscuits.”
What I quickly surmised was that she identified my onesie as her Mama’s fur.
Instant nostalgia. Instant Mama réassurance. Instant comfort/bliss.
This next photo captured that blissful and adorable face, looking at me.
Instant connection. Instant bond.
We had a breakthrough. The next photo, after about five minutes of “making biscuits,” had her curl up in relaxed happiness.
My heart was all a-flutter.
Not to be outdone by her sibling, Holy Ingenue also has her take on “making biscuits,” on “milktreading.”
However, she gravitates towards an inanimate object: our blue bathmat.
Supposedly, cats vividly see two main colors: blue and yellow, In any case, our little Holy Ingenue storms the bathroom whenever she gets the signal that we are headed that way.
And she seizes the bathmat, grabbing it with her biscuit-making paws, kneading, purring, being in bliss, while focusing, with laser-like precision, on the object of her kittenhood nostalgia.
We think that the bathmat, like my flannel onesie, must give off some kind of “mother cat fur.”
Holy Ingenue will have at it for at least a good, five or ten minutes.
After that, she beams with such a look of contentment and pride.
She is satisfied.
For those of us, “of the human persuasion,” it can seem adorable, amusing, and harmless (except, perhaps, for the puncture wounds of milk-treading paws left in us).
And maybe, we can even elevate ourselves with pride, believing that we are so much greater, smarter, and more mature than a spirited kitten.
Not so fast.
“For through the grace having been given to me, I say to everyone being among you⁺ not to be high-minded above what it is necessary to think, but to think so as to be sound-minded, as YHWH allotted to each a measure of faith.”
Romans 12:3
Because, here, my friend, is where you and I gloss over our own thumb-sucking immature ways.
“Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation.”
1 Peter 2:2
Yes, two camps: Maturity or Immaturity.
Where do you and I reside?
A little “making biscuits” inventory, perhaps?
“Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming.”
Ephesians 4:14
It’s not just schemes that cause us to “suck our thumbs.”
It’s-uh- some stuff in our personalities.
Don’t kill the messenger. You and I are “but dust” (Psalm 103:14).
So, our dusty selves have some “biscuit-making,” “thumb-sucking” tendencies, clunking around.
Immaturity shows up in several different ways, like…
Impatience…
Gravitating towards vices…
Temper tantrums (clean up on aisle four)…
Comfort-seeking behavior…
Any of these ringing bells for you?
All of them show up for me, in my life.
“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.”
Hebrews 12:1
Yep, these things are just some of the examples of being “easily ensnared.”
“In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of YHWH’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food!”
Hebrews 5:12
That starts by learning.
“So as to walk in a manner worthy of Elohim to Him: bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of YHWH.”
Colossians 1:10
Learning. Discovering. Applying.
“For someone who lives on milk is still an infant and doesn’t know how to do what is right. Solid food is for those who are mature, who through training have the skill to recognize the difference between right and wrong.”
Hebrews 5:13-14
When we turn from our go-to habits, our default setting, and our pacifers of all kinds, we can, ever so slowly, but surely, move from immature to mature. And get better results from that.
Is that process fun?
(What do you think?)
Seriously, the maturing process is a sliding scale for each of us. Individual. Unique.
As unique as how you and I have chosen, throughout our lives to “make our biscuits.”
It may not be as adorable as felines engaging in their nostalgic behaviors, nevertheless, these things can signal us going from maturity to maturity, even if/when it seems infantile or juvenile.
But if we keep trying…
“Not that I have already attained or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me.”
Philippians 3:12
It’s not just a “cop-out” scripture. It’s a reminder of our pesky humanity. And we all have that about us.
Let’s pray.
Abba Father-
We come to you, in The Name of Our Savior, Your Son, Yahshua.
You know how immature or mature we are right now.
You know where we are.
Forgive us and help us with our choices that do not glorify You.
You know how we choose things that we should have “outgrown” by now.
Vices. Addictions. Character traits that are childish.
You know them all.
Help us to change and grow in the way You desire us to become the people You desire us to become.
We need so much help with this. Thank You for helping us, every step of the way.
We receive Your Help now, in Yahshua’s Name.
Amen.
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Do You Want To Die? (“Hello, Gentlemen…”)
“‘Why is light given to the miserable,
and life to the bitter of soul,
who long for death that does not come,
and search for it like hidden treasure?’”
Job 3:20-21
Suicidal ideation.
It’s a prison within a prison of inmates, yes.
AND it is a prison for how many of us “on the outside?”
Do you want to die?
What IS your honest answer?
“When the jailer woke up and saw the prison doors open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself, presuming that the prisoners had escaped. But Paul called out in a loud voice, ‘Do not harm yourself! We are all here!’
Acts 16:27-28
We have this in common “with them.”
And each one of us need Our Savior, Our Shepherd, Our Messiah, Yahshua (“YAH IS SALVATION”).
“The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.
John 10:10
And Our Savior does not want us to harm ourselves. He was sent, on mission, from Our loving, Heavenly Father (John 3:16).
“For YHWH so loved the world that He gave the Son, the only begotten, so that everyone believing in Him shall not perish but shall have eternal life.”
Where are you right now?
And HOW are you, right now?
Are you in the prison of wanting to die?
He wants you to live, right now.
He also wants you to remember “them.”
“Remember those in prison as if you were bound with them, and those who are mistreated as if you were suffering with them.”
Hebrews 13:3
Amazon.com: "Hello Gentlemen...": 9798259016163: Cruse, Sheryle: Books
(Rocky) Let the weak say I am strong! (Cancerventures)
“…Let the weak say, ‘I am strong!’”
Joel 3:10
Amazon.com: Cancerventures: Tales of a Diagnosed Woman eBook : Cruse, Sheryle: Kindle Store
A Hug and a Kiss? (“Just Violated?”)
What WAS that? Sexual harassment? Or sexual assault?
Confusion was something that seemed to be definite.
Stuck in a moment.
You have probably had encounters that qualify under that definition, right?
Moments that you ask yourself, “What WAS that?”
“But all things should be done decently and in order.”
1 Corinthians 14:40
If confusion was present, it, more than likely was NOT “decent” or “in order.”
And what you experienced, being stuck IN that moment, was NOT your fault!
Our Father AND Our Shepherd Savior saw ALL of what happened!
Our Father has not stopped loving you; neither has Our Shepherd!
“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor things present nor things about to be, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of YWHW that is in (Yahshua HA-Mashiach) Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:38-39
If there was any power imbalance you were stuck in, you were not to blame.
You did the best you could, to survive, and be safe, IN that moment.
Seek The Father, seek His Loving Healing and Acceptance of you right now.
What happened to you was NOT right.
But The Most High will make it right!
Accept His Loving and Involvement in your life right now!
(“Just Violated?” Book Excerpt)
“A Hug and a Kiss.”
Harmless, you say? Well, maybe you will change your mind when you discover who hugged and kissed me.
My college theatre professor.
Wait, I’m not done.
As a theatre major, I was involved in college productions. In this instance, I was the twenty-year-old Assistant Director of the Spring production…
My theatre professor was its director.
Let me set the scene, since I am so theatrically inclined.
I was standing in the lobby area of the theatre department, looking at the poster for the production.
My Professor/Director comes up behind me, engulfing me with a big bear hug. I froze.
What do I do? What do I say?
There was no one else roaming around the department at this point. An opportune time, I suppose.
He didn’t say a word. He was over six feet tall, to me, being a, then, five-foot four stature in height.
And even though I was overweight at the time, from the “Bulimia phase” of my eating disorder behaviors, I still felt overpowered, miniscule in his bear hug shadow.
He hugged me silently for probably two minutes.
And then, he kissed my neck.
What?
Now what am I supposed to do?
I looked around to see if other people were walking around the college campus. There must be somebody here. It was during afternoon classes. Where were the people?
But no one was there. Ghost town. Complete silence.
He kissed my neck, uncoiled his ruddy and hairy arms from me, and walked away…
What was it that I was born into? What was it that I endured?
What WAS I “a product of?”
Rape? Abuse? Violence?
(“Just”) Violation?
Amazon.com: (“Just”) Violated?
Meet Cute? And Etc… (Cancerventures)
(Cancerventures Book Excerpt)
… Will This Appointment with the New Surgeon Be a “Meet-Cute?”
I know. That’s probably asking too much.
But could we be on any kind of respectful same page? That’s probably more realistic… and to be determined.
I was fresh from my CA 27.29 blood test. Russell and I went upstairs, from Cancer Care, taking two elevators, to get to the second floor. We checked in for my appointment with Dr. W.* I read to pass the time; Russell played a game on his phone.
A nurse came out, “Sheryle?”
Here we go. Russell and I were ushered into the exam room. My blood pressure was taken: 113 over 75.
“Now, this is the first time you’ve met, right?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, you’re just going to love Dr. W.!”
I chose not to hop on that enthusiasm train. I said nothing in response.
“Okay, well, just change into the gown, opened to the front. The doctor will be in
shortly.”
I chatted with Russell, mid-story about my Tweety Bird Band Aid from the CA 27.29, when, knock-knock.
In walked my new surgeon. Outstretched hand, big smile.
“Nice to meet you…Nice to meet you…This is my husband, Russell…”
Okay, let’s get into it.
There was the introductory stuff about how Dr. M. had written notes about my situation. I envisioned scandalous things being said, like, “this patient thinks she is going to beat cancer…she’s delusional… she’ll probably argue with you…” I know. Doctors’ notes are supposed to be strictly professional, but really, I mean, there must be some dirt in there too, right? A head’s up warning about a patient who dares to challenge the infallible doctor?
I was asked if I had questions or concerns. I mentioned adjusting to my new normal body and what it should look like, at this point.
“Raise your arms.” I did.
“Oooh. Great range of motion.”
With the few post-surgery exercises I still was doing, I was able to reach, pick up things and function; I could use my arms.
Dr. W. then walked over to me, “feeling me up,” first on the left side…
“This seems normal, nothing going on here…” The words dovetailed into each other, almost muttering.
“Yeah, that’s the unaffected side.” I couldn’t help myself, chiming in.
Moving over to my right side, “Yeah, this feels slightly raised from the radiation. That’s common,” checking my arm pit area, “Yeah, I can feel you’re tight here, aren’t you?”
“Yes.”
Continuing to probe, Dr. W. scaled along my scar line.
“Nothing feels abnormal. I’ll place an order for physical therapy again.”
I asked questions about Lymphedema, the lifelong need for physical therapy, which may be a possibility. I was reassured my scar site did not feel like I had Lymphedema. Because I only had one node removed, there was a one percent chance of developing the condition; radiation boosted it to ten percent. So, highly unlikely.
The pouch-y, fleshy area just under my arm, I learned, was referred to in the medical community as a “dog- ear flap,” and was just the remaining tissue of me collected in that spot.
So, this exam was easy, uneventful, non-jarring. No challenging of my choices, no lecturing, no death threats. I detected no God aura in Dr. W. The nurse came back in to schedule my six- month appointment in November and that was that.
Okay, I think I can work with Dr. W.
Post-appointment, in the elevator ride downstairs, Russell and I talked.
“I wish I could have gotten Dr. W. instead of Dr. M. for my surgery.”
“Well, this was after the fact. If they had done your surgery, you might have encountered the exact same thing.”
Hmm. You just don’t know.
It was reassuring to see that, at least, from this one brief encounter, a surgeon could possibly be different. I could, likewise, have a different experience, a better one, with that person. I know I’m not objective to grade these specialists. Everyone has their own style and personality. And sometimes, it truly is about two personalities just not coming together very well.
Leading up to this appointment, I prepared myself with battle strategies, including fleeing and filing a formal complaint against the clinic. And I didn’t have touse them.
As great as this appointment went- and it did go well- I strongly advise having at least one or two strategies for handling a situation. You just don’t know who you’ll encounter. It may be ho-hum, business as usual, it may be kismet and you’ve, indeed, found a new best friend. Or it could be tense, frustrating, and fear-inducing- or any shade of grey within any ofthose possibilities.
The lesson: trust your gut; know thyself. If something is not working, you don’t have to stay tied to it. There are other doctors. No, it’s not convenient to go shopping for them, but you shouldn’t have to feel trapped by a health care professional, either.
Now, before you think I classify Dr. M. as some Nazi, let me clarify things. My experience with this individual was not what I hoped it to be.
But did this surgeon give me information? Yes.
Did this person do a good job, as far as my surgery went? Yes, I think so.
For the most part, I haven’t had problems with my scar site. I had no infections, only the uncomfortable breast plate feeling I still contend with and the “dog-ear flap” (woof). I’m doing okay.
But I don’t know what constitutes a great surgery versus a mediocre surgery. And a scary movie kind of surgery, with results, like infection, a botched scar site, excessive bleeding, and dramatic complications would speak for itself as being a bad surgery experience.
If I knew I could have a positive communication experience with Dr. W. in the entire process of my appointments through, ultimately, my breast surgery and beyond, yes, I probably would have preferred Dr. W. to Dr. M…
What’s That Code For? (“IF You Know?” and “Just Violated?”)
“…what is His Name, and what is His Son’s Name, if you know?”
Proverbs 30:4
How are you described by people who love you and know you? By your family? What’s the story?
What are “the code words?”
What’s the explanation?
“It is the glory of The Most High to conceal a thing: but the honor of kings is to search out a matter.”
Proverbs 25:2
“…In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.”
2 Corinthians 13:1
www.whatishisname.com/name-the-issue/cynthia-hull-if-you-know-book-excerptnbsp
If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books
What was it that I was born into?
What was it that I endured?
What WAS I “a product of?”
Rape? Abuse? Violence?
(“Just”) Violation?
Amazon.com: (“Just”) Violated?
Let the weak say I am strong! (Cancerventures)
“…Let the weak say, ‘I am strong!’”
Joel 3:10
Amazon.com: Cancerventures: Tales of a Diagnosed Woman eBook : Cruse, Sheryle: Kindle Store
My Times? His Hands! (Cancerventures)
“Your eyes saw my unformed body, and in Your book all of them were written—the days fashioned for me, and not one was yet among them!”
Psalm 139:16
Commemorate the milestone days, including, yes, even “A diagnosis anniversary day.”
You are still here…by design. By His intention.
There is tremendous meaning and Victory in that!
You are worth honoring in each day you live!
“My times are in your hands; deliver me from the hands of my enemies, from those who pursue me.”
Psalm 31:15
A diagnosis anniversary.
We remember those markers.
The day that changed life for you and I.
Change is a part of life.
If you have a diagnosis anniversary, mark it. Commemorate it. Celebrate it.
You are here. You are not “there.”
Look how far you have come!
And look at how The Most High has kept and held you!
Amazon.com: Cancerventures: Tales of a Diagnosed Woman eBook : Cruse, Sheryle: Kindle Store
“D- Day” (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)
…So, after waiting through this long weekend, July 11th came. I was on the loveseat; my husband was in the recliner nearby. Braced for impact. Shortly after 9 o’clock, the phone rang; I put it on the speakerphone so Russell could hear.
“Hi, Sheryle, it’s Joy. So, we have your biopsy results back and unfortunately, there is the presence of cancer…”
(Hubby) grabbed my hand.
She then started getting into the findings, medical jargon all its own language…
“Invasive Mammary Carcinoma, Nottingham grade 3 of 3, at least 1.1 cm in greatest dimension. Focal Ductal Carcinoma In Situ.”
This was real.
I scheduled a consultation with the surgeon for that Thursday. I thanked her for the phone call and hung up.
And then, I operated in states of being numb, scared, and fraught with crying jags.
This diagnosis news, indeed, on 7-11 was my 9-11.
Explosion. Disaster. Life-changing event.
Ta-Ta-Ta- Tina!
And then, my mind focused on a famous nickname for breasts: “Tatas.” I couldn’t stop thinking about it. This obsession eventually led to Tina Turner.
Diagnosis day, my mind kept obsessing about the word. Tatas would not fall out of my head. I felt disempowered, looking for any image of female encouragement. Enter Tina Turner.
A lot of times, people have a stuttering reaction to Tina's performance by stating, ‘Ta- Ta- Ta- Tina Turner!!!!’ And then they scream and fan out.
But if you know Tina's story, you know there is a nemesis to the late, great Ta-Ta-Ta-Tina: Ike Turner, her abusive husband. Part of Tina's triumph is reinventing and freeing herself from that abusive dynamic. Ike was a cancer. He was taking up toxic space. He had to go. And that transcended the breasts-do-they-stay-or-do-they-go issues. I am Tina, not my breasts.
This was how my mind worked on July 11th, 2017. And it stuck.
I had a special place in my heart for Tina’s sci-fi character, Aunt Entity in the 1980s film,“Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome.”
Her character was fully decked out in a chainmail dress that, still, to this day, I wouldn’t mind adding to my wardrobe.
I’m serious. Dress it up with pearls; dress it down with a jean jacket.
Anyway, I immediately had those Aunt Entity images seared into my brain and Tina, in one way or another, would be a kind of cancer alter ego for me. I decided.
Now, let’s fight Ike…
Mommy Issues (“Hello, Gentlemen…”)
With the male inmate population, perhaps, most of us are not surprised that there would be “Mommy Issues” going on.
And again, we can have more in common with “them” than we initially think.
For any human being, behaviors, habits, choices, and heart issues begin in childhhood
“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6
Many of “them,” like many of “us,” do not get the mothering we need. There may, indeed, be the ABSENCE of The Fruit of the Spirit…
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”
Galatians 5:22-23
As we consider what we have in common “with them,” we also have the opportunity to turn to OUR FATHER, Who Loves us AS a Loving MOTHER…
“As one whom his mother comforts, So I will comfort you...”
Isaiah 66:13
Let’s get closer TO that eternal Truth, for healing, for understanding, and even, for an insight into “them.”
“Remember those in prison as if you were bound with them, and those who are mistreated as if you were suffering with them.”
Hebrews 13:3
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Shameful? (“Just Violated?”)
“My dishonor is continually before me, and the shame of my face has covered me.”
Psalm 25:20
“Just” shameful.
I am “just” shameful.
What was done to you?
What choices, from another person, have made you feel ashamed of yourself?
Shame’s roots run deep.
We often take on someone else’s shame for THEIR actions.
Rape. Molestation. Incest. Abuse.
And complicating and confusing these issues, even more?
All these things can get dismissed, ignored, or further used as punishment for us.
“Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed; neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame; for you will forget the shame of your youth...”
Psalm 34:5
But we have a Loving Father, and an empathetic Shepherd…
“They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed.”
Hebrews 12:2
Furthermore, our Savior, took all shame, took YOUR shame…
“Looking unto (Yahshua) Jesus, the Author and Finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of (The Most High) God.”
Psalm 25:3
Turn To Him now. Ask Him for His loving Help.
He wants to heal your shame, even right now.
What was it that I was born into? What was it that I endured?
What WAS I “a product of?”
Rape? Abuse? Violence?
(“Just”) Violation?
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