Yank ‘Em Already! (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

“Remove the dross from the silver, and a silversmith can produce a vessel.”

Proverbs 24:5

Yank ‘Em Already!  (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

…Yank ‘Em Already!  

The next day, October 10th, finally, was my drain removal day. It could not come fast enough. They were becoming increasingly itchy.  

So, can we please yank them? 

“Hubby” and I arrived at the surgeon’s office. I hopped on a reclining exam table and Dr. M. removed the bandages, approving of how I had been healing, thus far. 

“Okay, deep breath in, on the count of three…one, two, three!” My right- sided drain didn’t hurt at all; it pulled right out. I was relieved, especially as that drain site felt more irritated of late. 

Moving on to my left side, the same drill: “Okay, deep breath in, on the count of three…one, two, three!” 

Ye-e-e-owww!   

That one smarted and resisted coming out before the complete yank. I saw Russell wince and look away. Not a great sign there that things are hunky dory.  Dr. M. nonchalantly explained, “Sometimes they catch.”

Sometimes they catch.  

I was re-bandaged. I had another checkup later in the month.  

I quickly looked in the mirror. That lumpy spot, just below the collarbone on my right side, was gone. I asked what had happened to it. 

“Oh, that was the drain.” 

Wow. It was shoved up that far, huh? Bizarre. It made me feel like I was incubating a tape worm... 

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

 

“Olive”

“Olive”

“…What is His Name, and what is His Son’s Name, if you know?”

Proverbs 30:4

There is power in a name, a word, and an adjective.

From my personal experiences, I discuss what id cod for “Olive.”

Check out the actress, Cynthia Hulle.

What do you see?

See any resemblance as you look at yourself?

Ask The Most the deep, scary questions, including, “What is Your Name?”

www.whatishisname.com/name-the-issue/cynthia-hull-if-you-know-book-excerptnbsp

If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books

Speckled Bird

Go check out Jeremiah 12:9…

“Has not my inheritance become to me like a speckled bird of prey that other birds of prey surround and attack? Go and gather all the wild beasts; bring them to devour.”

What comes up for you, in your life?

There’s more going on than we realize.

If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books

The Radiation “Get List” (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

“Wisdom is the principal thing; Therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding.”

Proverbs 4:7

The Radiation “Get List” (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

…(Before you undergo radiation, you will need stuff). 

Radiation Get List:  

A large tote bag, as there will be no Sherpa to help you lug your stuff around.  

Any device which streams Netflix, Hulu, YouTube, etcetera, for all your waiting and distraction needs. (“Hubby” bought a Kindle Fire for me and it has been a sanity saver. I’ve watched a lot of bad television, cute animal videos and documentaries on it).  

Aquaphor and Aloe Vera Gel, to keep your skin from bursting into flames.  

Miaderm-especially when your skin starts tightening and cracking. (This product is a  

Godsend).  

Ice packs (again, for when your skin feels like it’s on fire).  

Large soft cotton button- down shirts, because you will have difficulty putting things on and taking them off over your head.  

Large, disposable T-shirts (because the Aquaphor and Aloe Vera goop will make your clothes greasy). Don’t wear anything silk when you’re this slimy!  

Leggings and comfy clothes for radiation- comfort. (If you want to wear ballgowns and tiaras, that’s your business. But soft, lounge attire, verging on pajamas, is what is needed).   

Alright, let’s get irradiated…  

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

 

Anorexia: Wearing Layers

Shirley (IF You Know?)

Trying To Find The Tape

This is one of the great human challenges in life.

Trying to find the beginning where packing or Scotch tape begins.

Ever have a roll of tape without its convenient dispenser?

It’s like this…

Hide and seek. Peekaboo.

And all we want to do is tape something.

Yet all we find ourselves doing is grasping for the starting point.

Grasping for it.

Groping.

Did you know that groping shows up in Scripture?

And it’s not a “little grope,” either.

It’s a significant grope.

“So that they should seek (Elohim) the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us. for in Him we live and move and have our being, as also some of your own poets have said, ‘For we are also His offspring.’”

Acts 17:27-28

Yep.

Groping. It doesn’t just happen. It’s an education.

We don’t know what to look/grope for.

“We love Him before He first loved us.”

1 John 4:19

We don’t even know we are lost, at any given point in our lives.

Most of us, in one way or another, just thrash and bump into dark space after dark space.

We believe various lies.

Sometimes, we think that something that appears to be so close to us, within reach, is the answer to our lives…

And then, there are times when we only are going backwards…

Yeah.

We are doing great, aren’t we?

Why am I employing all these cat gifs?

Well, yes, I admit it. I am a sucker for these things. They are just funny. And my ridiculous nature does like to be amused. I’m a cat lady.

But these gifs, displaying animals in these hysterical situations, appropriately enough, display our HUMAN behavior.

And let’s be real. We all have had some kind of bucket on our heads.

Getting back to our “lost-ness.”

We believe that “this is the way,” and “that is the way.”

We try all kinds of vices, sins, “solutions,” people, and things to find our way.

Nothing works.

Probably, because we are GOING the wrong way.

Again, this is us, in the feline fella here…

Way, way, WAY off course!

Because, drumroll, please…

“….I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.”

John 14:6

Yep, take the buckets and the lampshades off our heads. Nothing that we “try” works.

Cue The Spirit: “Unless the spirit draws…”

“No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

John 6:44

Attention-getting. The Most High is a Master at it.

Sooner or later, in our lives, we have our attention… “got” by Yahshua.

Think about it.

How many of us have been living our lives for years, for even decades, without seriously giving The Savior His due? We can blow Him off. Maybe, we convince ourselves that our denominational upbringing is “enough” to keep us in good stead.

Maybe we think He is irrelevant. After all, that was ancient times, right?

Maybe, we don’t even know that we are supposed to think about Him.

I think He gets a charge responding to this one.

Because it is SO dramatic. Least likely.

“Suddenly.”

“Suddenly, there was a sound from heaven like the roaring of a mighty windstorm, and it filled the house where they were sitting.”

Acts 2:2

“For as the lightning flashes in the east and shines to the west, so it will be when the Son of Man comes.”

Matthew 24:27

It does not need to be as grandiose as a Hollywood production.

But the “Suddenly”/attention-getting thing cannot be denied.

Something shifted. We cannot “un-know” now.

The Spirit drew us. There is no returning to our “pre-drawn-by-The-Spirit” state.

So, do we think we have finally discovered the metaphorical beginning of the tape, as taunted in this meme?

Well, yes and no.

Infuriating. I know. Just stay with me here.

For, next on deck…

We see through things darkly.

“For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”

1 Corinthians 13:12

Even with our eye-opening, Spirit-drawn, and illuminating experiences, lighting up our need for The Most High, through Yahshua, our Savior, we still can fumble around in the dark a bit.

Some of this fumbling, is our sins, our poor choices.

And some of it is just that we do not know all there is to know.

How’s THAT for an infuriating answer?

It infuriates me. Recovering, insecure, control freak that I am.

But I am NOT in control. And I am certainly NOT Omnipotent.

He is.

That’s what He wants us to accept, however gradually, suddenly, or anywhere in between.

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.”

John 15:5

Apart from Him, we can do nothing.

We are that helpless, that dependent.

Without Him, I couldn’t type any of these words. Without Him, you couldn’t read any of them. Without Him, we could not see, hear, know, do, breathe, or be.

That’s a comprehensive list, isn’t it?

Humbling, but exactly.

We are, therefore, encouraged to keep pursuing Him.

Grope for Him.

Keep groping FOR Him…

 

“So that they should seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us. for in Him we live and move and have our being, as also some of your own poets have said, ‘For we are also His offspring.’”

Acts 17:27-28

It’s a Relationship, extending, even far beyond “lifestyle.”

It is intimate. It is real. It is relevant. It is the beginning of the true tape we have been spending our entire being trying to find.

Have you “found your being” in Him?

Let’s pray.

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of Your Son, My Savior, Yahshua.

You know how I have been trying to find so much in my life.

You see how I have repeatedly failed.

I feel like I am struggling, in the dark, in vain.

Forgive me; help me.

You know my every thought and my every wound.

You see how all of them have led me to keep searching for answers.

You are My Answer.

Long before I ever even knew that there was a Scripture, encouraging me to grope for You.

By faith, now, I do.

I come to You, with a groping spirit, heart, mind, and will.

You know I cannot do anything without You.

Help me to gain a better understanding of that.

Help me; I need Your Help in every area of my life.

Don’t leave me to myself.

Thank You for keeping me throughout my life.

I fully give it to You, now, by faith.

Be glorified with, in, and through it.

Thank You.

I receive You; I grope after You,

In Yahshua’s Name,

Amen.

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Beyond Scripture To Him

When we think of Yahshua, Our Savior, we often think of a Loving Shepherd, beckoning us to return to Him, as a flock of sheep, responding to their Guardian’s call.

“On The Way,” by Hink Hinkle

The Shepherd Calling the Sheep

So, Matthew 11 is quite familiar to us…

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”
Matthew 11:28-29

How many times have we heard this passage? In prayer? At altar calls? In sermons? In Bible studies?

It is ubiquitous.

It’s the comforting rallying cry, especially if/ when we are weary spiritually, or, at the very least, sleep-deprived…

Scripture, to most of us out there, is regarded as something powerful.

Wise.

Life-giving.

We, again, can all nod our heads at Isaiah 55:9-11:

“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.”

We believe The Word. We accept that it works. Scripture is a must-have.

Okay, so now I’m gonna go somewhere a bit out there.

Please don’t come for me, with lit torches, calling me a heretic…

I have been reading Scripture for decades. This is not to get a Brownie Button.

My tour of duty as a Girl Scout has beaucoup badges on it. Thanks. I’m set.

We hear, over and over again, that, in reading Scripture, we can come across the same passage repeatedly, and it doesn’t affect us.

And then, one day, Whammo!

Rhema Word. Angel Choir. Lightning and Thunder.

It hits. It just hits.

Well, I had that happen to me a few months ago, “while reading The Bible.”

And the attention-grabbing thing about this Scripture, in particular?

It mentioned Scripture.

How’s that for a mind tilt?

But more than that, it also mentioned Yahshua.

Our Savior. Our Shepherd.

I don’t think this Scripture gets “as much press” as that of Matthew 11:28-29.

But I think it should.

In my opinion, they should be “companion scriptures,” studied and reflected on together.

You cannot have one Truth without its Twin Truth?

Okay, I know. I am keeping you in suspense.

So, what is this scripture?

Behold…

“You search the Scriptures, for in them you think you have eternal life; and these are they which testify of Me. But you are not willing to come to Me that you may have life.”
John 5:39-40

Whammo!

See what I mean?

Okay, for fun and edification, just humor me. Let’s Twin these scriptures and see what comes up.

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”
Matthew 11:28-29

“You search the Scriptures, for in them you think you have eternal life; and these are they which testify of Me. But you are not willing to come to Me that you may have life.”
John 5:39-40

See anything here?

Hmmm.

What popped up for me was yet another Scripture. It is probably in the mid-range, or “semi-famous” category of well-known Scriptures…

“And when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathen do. For they think that they will be heard for their many words.”

Matthew 6:7

Uh…OUCH!

That was a little of some of what I felt. Convicted, maybe?

Yeah, I know Scripture is real, alive, powerful. I know it accomplishes much.

We are told that The Most High IS something powerful, connected to His Name and His Word…

“I will worship toward Thy holy temple, and praise Thy Name for Thy lovingkindness and for Thy Truth: for Thou hast magnified Thy Word above all Thy Name.”

Psalm 138:2

“If we are unfaithful, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Who He is.”

2 Timothy 2:13

So, what’s the sticking point, then?

Yahshua is MORE than THE WORD.

And yes, He Is that.

“these are which testify of me.”

Scripture testifies. Yes, it does.

But He Is a real Individual.

He took on the human being suit, walking around in it, so that He could experience empathy at our humanness.

He is Deity. All powerful.

But humanity?

Well, that required acknowledgement of weakness, frailty, vulnerability… NEED.

Human beings are helpless, needy, and sometimes, stupid sheep.

There is a reason we are referred to as that animal and not a sexy, sleek Jaguar, for instance.

Yeah.

We don’t have it together. We need a Shepherd.

Cue The Shepherd, then… and His “Come to me” call.

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”
Matthew 11:28-29

Scripture is wonderful, in its testifying of our Savior/Shepherd.

But it should never be the “vain imagination” we take for granted, replacing real acceptance, real acknowledgement, and real relationship WITH THE REAL INDIVIDUAL OF YAHSHUA.

(“Shouty Caps,” there, so you know I’m fired up about this).

And, yeah, I’m convicted, too.

After all…

“…But you are not willing to come to Me that you may have life.”

This speaks to more than just a one-time altar call.

This is about consistent relationship, day after day.
Do we “Come to Him, that we may have life?”

DO WE?

Think about it. When was the last time you truly did that?

I’m not picking on you. I fall short here… a lot.

I do not come to Him and receive life as often as I should.

Call it being in a rush…

Feeling inconvenienced…

Just not feeling it…

Or leaning too much on a “vain imagination” of a quick Bible verse, and then I am on to something that I feel is REALLY important.

Yeah.

Abba. Yahshua.

(John 10:30)…

Forgive me.

Let’s face it. We all need a lot of help in the “Coming to Him” department.

No one has a lock on it.

We all fall short.

So, let’s pray for help in this area.

I need it. How about you?

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of Yahshua, My Savior.

I admit it. I do not always “come to Him, to have life.”

Father, Forgive me.

I can come up with all kinds of excuses and reasons.

None of these things carry weight in eternity.

I need Your Help, to truly, constantly, “Come to Him.”

Yahshua.

Thank You for having Him die for me.

I’m having trouble, right now, living for Him the way You desire me to live.

Forgive me and help me.

I come, therefore, not just to the Scriptures that testify of Him, but to Him directly, honestly, right now.

I know that I cannot hide from You. You know all. You know everything about me.

Help me, then, to truly hear, seek, and come to Him constantly.

Thank You.

I believe You will help me to love, live for, and be intimately connected with Your Beloved Son.

I receive it all, by faith, now.

In The Name of Yahshua,

Amen.

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Good Meal or Bad Meal?

I have mixed feelings about an image making the rounds on social networking sites. It’s a split screen of a hamburger and fries on one side and a salad on the other.

It reads as follows:

“One ‘bad’ meal won’t make you fat...Just like one ‘good’ meal won’t make you skinny.”

As a person in eating disorder recovery, my antenna goes up whenever I come across images/messages which portray a kind of “half- truth.” I believe this image is, indeed, one such message. Yes, logically, we know one serving of junk food will not make us weigh 1,000 pounds. Likewise, eating a salad will not transform us into some perfect being. Both are not realistic. But, this statement, while possessing this “half-truth,” still, however, contains its bottom-line message: the certain desired image is a thin body.

To me, it smacks of a backhanded compliment. I remember once, when I was twenty-two years old, my younger roommate (age nineteen) once told me, “You’re not that old.”

 (Those of you older than twenty-two, please feel free to chuckle here).

But I feel this good meal/bad meal sentiment is like that. It TRIES to make us feel better, to soothe fears, to help. However, the main message still contains a judgment in it, saying, “even if you eat, the worst possible thing in the world (being fat) won’t happen to you.”

It’s the judge-y food equivalent to “The Wizard of Oz” Glinda-to-Dorothy question mark, “Are you a good witch or a bad witch?”

 But the value placed on thinness and the fear of fat are still there.

It’s complicated, isn’t it? I mean, c’mon, let’s face it, since the beginning, there have been food issues going on. Ever hear of Adam and Eve?

“And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.”

Genesis 3:6

Yeah. It’s about desire; it’s about fulfilled need. It’s about something which “looks good.”

But is it? And is it supposed to be that estimation to us?

That’s where much of the issue lies right? We subscribe more value to food than it warrants.

“Is not life more than food?”

Yahshua, in Matthew 6:25

In its basic purpose, it keeps us alive. It doesn’t love us, comfort us, punish us or rescue us. It keeps us living.

And, ideally, from the wide variety of choices out there, food is designed to keep us healthy. Vitamins, minerals, nutrients, protein, carbohydrates and fats are a part of that process.

But where do we usually place our focus? On the calories, right? Enter the “good food/bad food” principle. And each one of us has a definition that falls under those headings, right?

Salads and vegetables usually fall under the “good” heading; ice cream and cookies usually comprise the “bad.”

But, while, yes, there are healthy and not so healthy choices out there, food does not have the power we believe it has. It’s a resource, a tool, a vehicle, something to be used for its INTENDED purpose. When it isn’t, however, that’s when eating disorders and unhealthy views/expectations come in, creating chaos and harm.

And we often don’t see it, gradually believing food/diet lies we’ve been exposed to over many years.

“For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice: but what I hate, that I do.”

The Apostle Paul in Romans 7:15

And then, “all of a sudden,” we are astonished because we have issues and/or eating disorders? We don’t understand, exactly, just how we arrived to this place of pain and confusion. But, nevertheless, here we are.

But we miss some major points. First, The Almighty created food, for us:

“Who giveth food to all flesh...”

Psalms 136:25

More specifically, He takes care of our needs:

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how (YAH) God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.

Matthew 6:25-32

The Most High isn’t anti-food; He knows we need it. Food is not a sin to Him. Wrong attitudes, however, are. It’s not because He wants to punish us; He doesn’t want us hurt by lies. And isn’t that what diets, “good and bad foods” are: lies?

So, what’s a more “Holy, Healthy” view of food? How about the following scriptures?

“All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not.”

1 Corinthians 10:23

“All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.”

1 Corinthians 6:12

“And having food and raiment let us be therewith content.”

1 Timothy 6:8

He’s not hung up on whether we eat a candy bar or a salad. He wants us to be healthy and happy. And He wants us focused on HIM, more than the food of the moment. Yes, that can be a challenge, especially if the food issue has been an all-consuming one in our lives.

But here’s where Psalms 136:25, once again, gives us hope:

“Who giveth food to all flesh: for his mercy endureth forever.”

Did you catch that second part?

“…for his mercy endureth forever.”

We’re not in control; He is. And He is not intimidated with our bodies, our functions and our responses to food. He knows how to handle us. He knows our needs, including our needs for His love, wisdom and mercy in our lives.

 Let’s trust that, then, instead of our “good/bad food” thoughts!

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

 

Two For One

“I and The Father are ONE.”

John 10:30

Back when I was in college, I took a photography class. Yep, me, the one who constantly has her thumb featured in every shot.

What do we think we see, as we look through a lens?

Camera or no camera, we see something.

Is it an optical illusion? Is it Truth?

“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he...”

Proverbs 23:7

We are familiar with the sales tactic: two for the price of one.

We are supposed to get all giddy about that.

What is better than one of something, after all?

How about two?

The only possible drawback, perhaps?

Where do we put the extra stuff? We only have so much room here.

(And we already have had to deal with our hoarding ways).

“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he...”

Proverbs 23:7

With overwhelming issues, it all comes down to our hearts, doesn’t it? What’s in them? What has damaged them? What has influenced them?

“For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”

Matthew 6:21; Luke 12:34

Therefore, it can be difficult to see one thing as it is, let alone, two things.

Indeed, with so much emphasis on the outward appearance, our inner issues, those demanding, even oppressive drives, can become pushed down, if not ignored altogether. It’s too scary, too painful to address and deal with.  But doing that kind of suppressing and ignoring cannot lead to healing; it can only promote festering.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Psalms 139:23-24

This brings me back to the optical illusion.

Years ago, these two examples were making the rounds on social media.

It was like a Rorschach test. You know. Blots of ink on a page. We are usually in some therapist or counselor’s office, presented with the inkiness.

“What do you see?”

And, depending upon our answer, a decision, a treatment, sometimes a drug was administered. We might be labelled as “emotionally unstable.” We might be labelled as “Dangerous to self or to others.” Maybe, we would be labelled as “normal.”

Maybe.

The two optical illusion tests I saw the most, making the social media rounds, were these.

The first asked:

“What do you see? A rabbit, or a duck?”

Is the image a set of bunny ears, or a beak? Is it a bunny’s eye, or a duck’s eye?

Personally, I see the bunny. Not far from the “eye,” I see what looks like a cute little wiggly bunny nose.

I love little twitchy bunny noses…

I have no idea what it means that I see the bunny, instead of the duck.

Does one result denote a great person, while the other denotes Hannibal Lector?

Unclear. I’m sure there is a matching personality test result out there somewhere for this particular optical illusion.

Moving on to the second one, popular on social media…

This one asks:

“What do you see: the young woman, or the old woman?”

Here is where we can really get into some life perspective stuff. Fears/obsessions with beauty and aging.

Without spoiling it for you too much, what facial features prominently stand out when you look at the image? Is one facial feature what it appears to be?

What about her “eye?” Where is it placed?

The Most High, Himself, takes viewpoints, heavily influenced by our hearts, into consideration.

He knows what’s REALLY going on with them.

And it goes beyond any so-called image.

“‘…For (Elohim) the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but (Elohim) the Lord looks on the heart.’”

1 Samuel 16:7

Our hearts are so important to Him, so vulnerable, He tells us to guard them…

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”

Proverbs 4:23

He wants us healed, healthy, and prospering; He wants to bless us…

“Beloved, I wish above all things that you may prosper and be in health, even as your soul prospers.”

3 John 1:2

And that leads me back to His Loving, Brilliant, Incomprehensible-to-the-finite-human-mind Nature and Vision.

It goes beyond ink blot tests, bunnies, ducks, young and old women pictures.

“Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in The Most High, believe also in Me.”

John 14:1

Yahshua.

The Ultimate Optical Illusion?

The Ultimate “Two For One?”

“I and The Father are ONE.”

John 10:30

Now, maybe you’re like me. A little on the fussy and analytical side?

Always picking something apart, trying to figure out, “What does it all mean?”

I have been known to get a little stressed out, in fact, trying to ascertain the two- as- one kind of reality.

I have often, in prayer, uttered the question, at least silently, in my mind…

“Now WHO am I talking to, here?”

Come on. You know you might think that same thing.

Which ONE? Father? Son?

And please don’t get me started on The Holy Spirit!

That’s another epic level of mystery to delve into another time.

As far as Father/Son stuff goes, well, in my finite little mind, I return, again, to the optical illusions.

But, for the purposes of keeping things within the human realm, let’s just concentrate on the young woman/old woman image.

Which woman is in the image?

Both.

This is not to start any kind of back-alley fight about being right or wrong.

Both ladies are there.

It’s the personal vantage point we possess, in terms of which one comes across as stronger.

It’s not about a nose here, a chin there, and, apparently, the big question about how her coat is wrapped around her.

Again, maybe, when we are younger, we identify with and see more of the younger woman.

Maybe, as we age, we see the older version.

Let’s get back to Father and Son.

For me, personally, I have gone through phases when ONE over The Other was more resonate with me. I don’t think I was in spiritual jeopardy coming from that place .

He knows our thoughts, all of them, from afar, anyway (Psalm 139:2).

Thirty years ago, when I had my rededication experience, it was highly featuring The Son: The Savior.

I wrote His Name everywhere in My journals. He was the focal point for me.

And, yeah, within good reason…

“….I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.”

John 14:6

Scripture translations differ a bit here. He’s referred to as “The Door” (John 10:9), and as “The Gate.”

“So He explained it to them: ‘I tell you the truth, I am The Gate for the sheep.’”

John 10:7

No matter what, however, one thing remains: He is the Entry Point.

And, because He experienced our humanness, He Is Also a Peer.

That Image of The Father/Son picture stood out more. Probably because it NEEDED to.

And then, as life and my faith rolled out further, things shifted more for me.

Having a plethora of “Daddy Issues,” having come from abuse. Not having a healthy, loving relationship with my dad, I started paying more attention to The Father.

Specifically, “Abba,” the Hebrew word for “Daddy.”

I wanted to be “Daddy’s Girl.”

It’s a complicated trek I am still on to this day. I don’t want to mislead you.

But there are times when I want to be “Fathered” or “Daddy-d.”

So, my prayer focus centered more on “The Daddy” aspect of things. I don’t think I’m disrespecting Yahshua. He’s helping me connect more to The Father.

That’s Who He is, and the Entire Reason He lived and died for us and our sinful natures.

Yes, we have, after all, Yahshua, Who’s constantly on our side, pleading our case.  

We need Him to do that.

“Who is He that condemneth? It is (Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, Who is even at the right hand of (The Most High) God, who also maketh intercession for us.”

Romans 8:34

It takes an adjustment, a shift in our thinking. It takes a redirected focus. What are we focusing on?

It takes a first step, even despite our freaked-out fears.

I have, imperfectly, over the years, become more accepting and comfortable with the mystery peace that can encompass the equally mysterious Duality of “Father/Son…”

“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

John 14:27

The Father and The Son are not an optical illusion. They are united in love for us.

A love that is beyond our explanations, beyond what we can see.

Nevertheless, The Divine WANTS us to see it, and, by faith, embark on relationship with Who They are.

Father.

Son.

Two For One.

Let’s pray.

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of Your Son, My Savior, The Door And The Gate for us all.

You know how I long to be connected with “You Both.”

I long to experience the reality of John 10:30.

Help me to love, to connect, to know, and to understand You “Both” fully.

It’s a mystery beyond my human mind. Forgive and help me as I struggle and doubt.

Forgive me for not seeing and loving You correctly.

Reveal Yourself to me in real ways, Loving ways.

Help me to be united with Who You are.

Thank You.

I don’t understand it all, but I, by faith, accept You, fully taking charge of my life now.

In The Name of Yahshua.

Amen.

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

It’s Not Just the Diagnosed Who Could Be Dying (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
Matthew 5:4

It’s Not Just the Diagnosed Who Could Be Dying (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

…It’s Not Just the Diagnosed Who Could Be Dying:

It’s cruel. Just because we get a cancer diagnosis, does not mean we are exempt from anyone else getting sick and dying. It’s especially painful if we have a beloved pet who has gotten us through the hard stuff of surgery, chemo, radiation. We should not have to face losing our treasured animals when we’ve already had to lose so much already. 

But, as we all know, life is not fair. And, unfortunately, the medical care of our animals is expensive. We cannot just throw unlimited amounts of money at attempts to keep our pets alive, even as we desperately declare that we’d do anything to save them. Reality has its limits.  

Please don’t blame yourself for “not being able to do enough.” This goes beyond your will; it speaks to capacity. And sometimes, we just don’t have it.  

MN Pets:  

So, with no signs of improvement, I called a local in-home euthanasia service, MN Pets. As I started the phone conversation, I broke down mid-sentence as I requested information. A comforting voice from Margie*, uttered things like, “I’m sorry;” “this is so difficult;” and “it sounds like you’re doing everything you can.”  

Through sobs, I asked for definite signs to know “when it’s time.” And Margie informed me of the Journey Assessment, authored by Dr. Katie Hilst, DVM.  

https://journeyspet.com

Used with permission.  

This assessment rates mobility, pain, respiration, hygiene, eating and drinking and the social ability issues of your pet.

I also asked about any benevolence funds, disclosing my cancer diagnosis.  

Margie informed me of their Buddy Fund. She’d speak to her supervisor, explaining my situation. I could expect a callback.  

Ten minutes later, the phone rang. We did qualify. MN Pets would cover most of the expense- for both the in-home euthanasia and her ashes. We’d just need to pay seventy-five dollars. 

Since euthanasia alone can go well into the hundreds of dollars, this was a much-needed help.  

I didn’t arrange things then and there. I needed to check out the Journey assessment. 

We were still waiting- and hoping- Gracie would get better. I told Margie we’d be in touch.  And, as we ended the call, she uttered, “Take good care…”

Amazon.com: Cancerventures: Tales of a Diagnosed Woman eBook : Cruse, Sheryle: Kindle Store

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

 

IF You Know? Introduction

If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books

The God Complex- (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

“I am (Elohim)the LORD; there is no other (Most High) God. I have equipped you for battle...”

Isaiah 45:5

The God Complex- (Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

…The God Complex- Do as I Say:  

My personal take, based on my experiences? The higher and greater the degree of specialty, the more likely a chance for an infallible ego to exist.  

Surgeons, especially, have gotten the distinction of possessing this “God complex.” They feel they hold life and death in their hands; they often believe their way should be the only way. One small detail, however: the patient. The human, complicated and unique patient.  

Doctors, in my opinion, can often get tunnel vision about data and results. A doctor can, therefore, possibly place less of his/her priority on the patient’s psyche and life- apart from cancer.  

And, as I have experienced numerous times, they don’t like being questioned or challenged.  

But, again, this is your life, your body, your experience with cancer. It is most personal. 

And it is your choice. You’re going to live with what happens in and to you, not your doctor.  

So, I don’t minimize the validity of a patient’s decision, even if it goes against the tide. 

No, I am not the poster girl for survivorship and treating cancer in the “right way” (not that there is a “right way” in the first place).  

Rather, I’m more interested in being the heard, diagnosed person. Call me delusional, impossible, unrealistic, or even suicidal. I see it as making the choices that are right for me, prayerfully, carefully, thoughtfully. But I still get to make my choice. 

And these are all reasons why I’m not best friends with my surgeon.  

But, hey, the world didn’t end. 

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Thin Enough Reintroduced

Amputated/Also Known As “Pruned”

“He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.”

John 15:2

I recently stubbed my right pinky toe. It is bruised.

This may not seem all that noteworthy. But I deal with a diagnosis, known as Peripheral Arterial Disease. It has to do with wonky blood flow, especially to the extremities, like my toes.

It is highly cautioned to protect one’s feet.

In its most advanced case, especially concerning injuries, amputation, unfortunately, can result.

So, me being me, I have been thinking about amputation.

I am a rather fussy Chicken Little. I admit it.

Weirdly, amputation has been a bit of a theme in my life.

First, I mentioned a study done of children, in my first book, “Thin Enough.”

“…The old saying is true: ‘Kids can be cruel.’ Getting picked last for games, snickering, name-calling, and the shunning were all part of my daily routine.

I once heard about a study of young children. They were asked a question: ‘If you could choose either an overweight person to be your friend or a person who’s missing an arm or a leg, which would you choose?’ The kids in the study all chose the missing limbed candidate. Fat, according to the kids then, was unacceptable to be around and befriend.

I came home from school each day and eased my pain with a stack of Oreo cookies, peanut butter and pickle sandwiches, potato chips and milk. I could feel better with my ‘true friends...’”

(Excerpt from “Thin Enough: My Spiritual Journey Through the Living Death of an Eating Disorder”)

Yeah, Selah.

 (Pause and think about THAT)!

Amputation wasn’t just discussed then and there. Oh no!

Years later, it hit my life more directly. In 2017, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

And, after tests, procedures, prayers, stressing, and crying, I decided to opt to have a bilateral mastectomy.

I decided to amputate my breasts.

Amputation. I don’t think that word is overkill when it comes to my breasts.

Its definition?

“the action of surgically cutting off a limb.”

Well, breasts aren’t regarded as limbs, per se.

But breasts are body parts. Body parts removed from the body…through surgery.

Therefore…

Amputation.

And it’s not just an event, a surgery, or a procedure. It’s a gradual process of letting go, of grieving. Of shedding.

…From the time I received my surgery date, to the actual event itself, I was in preparation mode.  

I was acutely aware of the countdown clock. It’s a certain number of showers I have left with my breasts. It’s a certain number of times I have left exercising with my breasts. It’s a certain number of times left I would wear my bras. 

As a larger busted female, I had a complicated view of brassieres. I tried to find the most feminine ones I could wear- black, lace and animal prints, mostly. These undergarments were necessary to be considered a fully dressed woman. But, once home, I took them off as soon as I could. For, no matter how racy or pretty or delicate they appeared, my bras were still uncomfortable. (Sometimes, I even unhooked them while I was still in the car). 

But now, with my mastectomy countdown clock, there was added poignancy. It was a mourning process. Each day that passed, I was ever aware, as I chose, put on, hooked myself into, wore and took off each bra. I was mindful I was running out of bras and days…

…I took my last shower, using the Dial antibacterial soap. I paid attention to the feel of my breasts connected to my body. It was more than just their weight; it was the feeling of them being attached to me. I’d taken it for granted my entire life. I complained about it. But now, I had precious few hours left of this experience. I had no clue what I’d feel physically from here on out. I was trying to take as many mental snapshots as I could…

(Cancerventures Book Excerpt)

The surgery itself may be radical cutting off body parts. But its reality is one of personal reflection.

Spiritual in nature. It tests faith.

And that leads me to circa now.

Spiritual is the foundation of everything in my life.

Faith. Struggles with it.

Challenges.

Amputation comes up again, and not just because of my fussy fears concerning my stubbed, bruised pinky toe.

“He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.”

John 15:2

“Pruning,” it can be argued, is “spiritual amputation.”

I am living within this space heavily now.

Not just because of my toe, “P.A.D.” or even the start of a brand-new year, but because there is a stripping going on right now.

It’s personal and global. Micro and macro.

Can/do you feel it in your own life?

Scripture states this about Yahshua, Our Savior, and The Most High, Our Father (see John 10:30, for their Oneness) …

“I am the true vine, and My Father is the keeper of the vineyard.”

John 15:1

Yahshua, Our Savior, is the point.

His Name, in Hebrew, means “YAH is Rescue” or “YAH is Salvation.”

(Go look it up. What is Hebrew for “Rescue?”).

He connects us to The Father, the Great Most High, for all eternity.

That sounds to me like an important Vine.

And, of course, Scripture goes on to say…

“He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and He prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.”

John 15:2

Pruning. Amputation of the highest order.

And it HURTS!!!!

Man alive, does it hurt!

I don’t know much about gardening. I have killed too many Chia Pets I have gotten as Christmas gifts.

(Just why?)

But the intimidating shears are not a joke.

It’s not a gentle bit of self-care, like tweezing eyebrows.

This is surgery level removal.

It’s not subtle. It targets the branches that may look “fine.”

Maybe even “good.”

Maybe even “necessary” or “helpful.”

Maybe even branches that we insist on saying, “Hey, I NEED THAT!”

That is especially what makes this spiritual amputation so painful.

We argue that we are not done with something yet.

We think we make a great case.

We think that we can persuade.

Except…

SNIP!

And it’s a loud, final snip, isn’t it?

The branch will not grow back as it once existed.

Gone.

So, what are some branches, posed for the shears?

Relationships

Careers

Habits

Addictions

Hobbies

SINS!

(Most of the time, these branches, in one way or another, are things we do not want to give up).

But The Vine says otherwise.

Why does The Vine say otherwise?

“He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and He prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.”

John 15:2

To produce even more.

Life audit: how productive or stagnant are we right now?

What’s going on in our lives that is not producing what it should?

Hard, painful questions to ask and answer.

And these questions, to paraphrase Ecclesiastes, “happen to us all” (Ecclesiastes 9:11).

Like death.

And, like death, there is grief in The Pruning Process.

Scripture declares that He comforts all who mourn (Matthew 5:4).

That’s not just concerning an actual death and funeral situation.

He comforts us is our afflictions, our losses, our pain…

Our pruning.

He doesn’t just cut us and leaving us bleeding out.

He’s there.

“I will never leave you or forsake you.”

Hebrews 13:5

Because one of the greatest ways more fruit is produced in and through a closer, deeper relationship with Him.

I know. It all sounds cliché.

Reality, though, is far more powerful than human explanation.

So, what do we do? Where do we go from here?

First: accept pruning will happen.

Our Savior’s ultimate pruning was The Cross. Dying for Mankind.

“A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a servant above his master.”

Matthew 10:24

“Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you. If they kept My word, they will keep yours also.”

John 15:20

“A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone who is perfectly trained will be like his teacher.”

Luke 6:40

Next: Stop struggling and fighting against it.

This is where most of us get tripped up. I camp out at this place A LOT.

MANY TEARS. ALL REAL.

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL.

And so is this Scripture…

“Not My Will, but Thy Will be done.”

Luke 22:42

Do we say that? Pray that? Mean that?

He wants more for us; He wants us to more fully experience His Love.

And, yeah, to do that, some things gotta go.

Not easy.

So, let’s pray.

 

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of Yahshua, My Savior.

You know what’s happening with me and within me right now.

You know the depth of my pain.

How much of it is because of change?

Your Change?

Your Pruning, at work in me?

Forgive me for my sins, especially my willfulness that resists You and Your Changes for me.

You know I struggle here.

Help me. Heal me, even as You change things in my life.

Help me to let go of whatever it is that I need to release.

You want me to bear more fruit in You and be more blessed.

I need so much help with this process.

Lead me, guide, anoint, favor, and have mercy on me as this all takes place.

Thank You for loving me.

This Pruning, while painful, is evidence that You do.

You love me too much to leave me how I am.

By faith, I agree with Your Word, which states that I am going from Glory To Glory (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Help me to glorify You.

I place my spirit, my life, my desires, my plans, my heart, and my future in Your Loving Hands.

I pray this in The Name of Yahshua,

Amen.

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Grandma’s Hair? (IF You Know? Book Excerpt)

Grandma’s Hair? (IF You Know? Book Excerpt)

 

…Grandma’s Hair?

Physically, Grandma possessed darker features. She had dark brown, curly hair, deep brown eyes, and copper- colored skin.

I looked at different photographs of her, including a toddler portrait, her adolescent “flapper” appearance in the 1920s, her bridal image, a few photos of her as a young mother and, of course, in her later years, when she reached “Grandma” status.

Through each photograph and era, I wondered if “there was something there.”

As I emailed these images to Raqel, especially a Polaroid taken months before her death, she insisted, “That looks like a little old black woman to me!”

What, exactly, was it about her appearance that triggered that response?

Yes, she had dark eyes and dark hair, hair faded grey by aging.

Raqel insisted my grandmother’s hair texture, not just hair color, was a large clue.

What had been described to me, since childhood, as “wire-y and coarse,” according to Raqel, was “kinky” instead.

When I was nine, Grandma spoke to me about one of her hair adventures.

During the long car ride of a family vacation, I was the restless kid, incessantly asking, “Are we there yet?”

Therefore, Grandma tried to keep me occupied with stories of when she was young.

She would have been an adolescent around the time of the late roaring twenties. The few photos I have of Grandma at this age confirm this.

She bobbed her hair in the fashion befitting the times. In these faded, sepia-toned images, she did resemble that stylish flapper. Chin length, dark hair was coiffed in gentle waves.

To achieve this look meant manipulation.

And my grandmother insisted her thick, coarse “wire-y” hair needed to be tamed by some extraordinary measures beyond simple curlers. Grandma bemoaned some hot curling instruments that she, her sister, and her friends used at that time to achieve the flapper hairstyle.

Again, we’re talking about the late 1920’s era. This would have been the time of all kinds of torture regimens, like permanents. I’ve seen horrifying old photos of women connected to contraptions which, to me, looked like they were rigged to an electric chair.

But, according to beauty history, this was also a boom time for hair care products and devices like hot combs. Hot combs were a particular staple for black women in dealing with their own hair. The revolutionary black entrepreneur, Madame C.J. Walker made a fortune on her products, including treatments and styling tools, like hot combs.

Was this what my grandmother used?

If the answer is “yes” to that question, then, again, my curious mind leaps to another thought: did Grandma use this possible hot comb device on her unruly hair because it was “black hair?”

She complained about how the beauty tool had to be heated before it was used. And she further complained about burning her scalp using it.

My memory of her storytelling emphasized the heat and the burned scalps, but not the device itself.

But it wasn’t curlers.

It was some kind of curling iron or today’s more modern “flat iron.”

What DID she use to tame her hair?

This faint memory may be quite a stretch in me making any connection to the black ancestry question.

Yet, again, specific products and treatments, like hot combs, were used by black women.

Was my grandmother aware of this?

Was this part of her arsenal to keep her secret and “be white?”

Was her hair, indeed, my maternal grandmother’s physical “tell?”

Was genetics peeking through, telling the truth about who she was?

Yes, a big question mark seemed to hinge on my grandmother.

And, again, it was accentuated by her behavior.

“…In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.”

2 Corinthians 13:1…

If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books

 

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

Baby New Year

A cute tyke, wearing a diaper and a top hat: Baby New Year.

Okay, so we are a week into the new year.

And how are things going?

The Promise of New.

Most of us have probably already “slipped” when it comes to resolutions, right?

Maybe that slippage happened on day 2.

Anyway, this year is still very young. It is still very much a Baby.

As I have been champing at the bit for some things, I have been thinking a lot about children.

Not about having children.

Rather, about the persistent nature of children that resides within us all.

Newsflash: I have struggled with my faith.

Newsflash: haven’t most of us?

This struggle, at least, for me, seems to come down to correctly viewing and inhabiting being a child.

Differentiating between being of “Childlike Faith,” and simply being “Childish.”

The “Baby” of “Baby New Year,” again, pops up for me.

Let’s look at the little guy.

He is a Baby. Yes. He’s a child.

Uncomplicated. Depicted simply.

A diaper, stating his “baby-ness,” and a top hat, to denote the formal celebration of the new year.

The tuxedo of the hope we place at the new start.

Optimism. Simplicity. No cynicism.

We all start out like that. In life, in love, in faith.

Childlike. Trusting.

Faith in Yahshua, Our Savior, emphasizes it even more.

He wants Childlike. Simple. Trusting.

 “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of (The Most High) God belongs to such as these.” 

Mark 10:4

I mean, come on, in all the illustrations and paintings of Yahshua, capturing the “suffer the little children” sentiment, I have yet to see a version in which there is some care-worn child, shooting a distrustful side eye at Our Savior.

Nope, we don’t see that artistically portrayed, do we?

What we usually see if some enthusiastic gif version of this…

The little ones are smiling; they are adoring Him.

They have “the childlike faith.”

Advertising and marketing obsess on selling that. That’s part of what advertising attempts to capture, especially around the Christmas season.

We just came out of it. How many times did you bump up against the phrase “childlike wonder?”

To sell socks and refrigerators?

Uh- okay. I cannot remember the last time I genuinely saw a child giddy over socks and refrigerators.

Never fear, Madison Avenue: selling dolls and toys is a successful commercial strategy that hooks the kiddies, no matter what.

“Childlike Evergreen.”

(I’m getting sidetracked a bit, with a smidge of cynicism).

Focus, Sheryle, focus.

Baby New Year.

We approach it, perhaps, with childlike faith.

Again, we see that “Baby New Year” embodies that sweet, simple childlike faith.

Rankin and Bass did a bang-up job portraying his sweetness in their 1976s stop motion classic, “Rudolph’s Shiny New Year:”

We are sweet. We are trusting.

Our spiritual ears wiggle when our top hats are removed.

 “Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of (The Most High) God like a little child will never enter it.”  

Luke 18:17

Indeed.

So, what happens, then?

Come on. You know. You are no stranger to it.

Life. Too many New Year promises that don’t deliver.

Our hearts.

Oh, great! I knew the heart issue would pop up sooner or later.

“The heart knows its own bitterness. And a stranger does not share its joy.”

Proverbs 14:10

Here is where “Baby New Year” takes a turn.

An edge surfaces to his sweet, diapered and top hat self. He is a bit more grizzled.

After going through how many New Years, with or without resolutions, we can get tired.

And yeah, bitter.

This was not our first rodeo.

“And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.”

Galatians 6:9

(There’s that heart again. A tired heart).

That’s what can happen, right?

After disappointment after disappointment, we grew tired.

Tired of waiting.

And this, then, can tap into…

“Childish.”

I know. I know. I know.

I am wincing. Believe me. I see and feel it.

“Childish” is about immaturity and impatience.

I feel scripture about patience coming up…

“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.”

James 1:2-4

(Groan).

I know. I’m not supposed to admit that out loud.

But GROAN.

I am officially… “Childish,” then?

I struggle with impatience.

Right now, I am impatient on at least three things in my life.

Including, yeah, “Baby New Year.”

And you probably can relate, right?

Unless you are uber-patient, uber- mature, and uber-childlike?

The “Childish” component of “Baby New Year” shows up for us, and in us, as the battle weary, impatient, tested-too-many-times, cynic.

Now, “Baby New Year” looks and acts differently.

Dark circles under the eyes, maybe.

Emotionally hungover, if not literally hungover (Yay, let’s hear it for self-medicating).

This version of “Baby New Year…” has seen some things.

Happy New Year! (Muttered sarcastically).

 “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”  

Matthew 18:3

 

Pleh. Scripture tires us out even further, in this state, huh?

I am not a cock-eyed optimist here. This is not the musical, “South Pacific.” I am not Nellie Forbush.

(I love Mitzi Gaynor).

Anyway, I know that I need to increase and improve in the patience department.

I know my “child” self needs an attitude adjustment, if not a full-on time out.

I know, however, that I just want a cookie.

(Sigh).

 “Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of (The Most High) God like a little child will never enter it.”  

Luke 18:17

Yet again, SIGH.

 

So, where to from here?

 

“When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”

1 Corinthians 13:11

 

Understanding. Yes that comes into view.

Reading The Word of The Most High.

Yeah, I note that.

A conundrum of a question: how do we become the “childlike faith” little child, while losing the childishness?

This goes WAAAAY BEYOND “Baby New Year!”

I cannot give you satisfying pat answers. I am gutting it out in the trenches.

But, a pat answer, with varying degrees of satisfaction to our tired impatient selves?

Prayer.

Uh, let’s pray.

I cannot solve this for you or for myself.

But HE CAN!

Let’s start “The Baby New Year” of it all… right there.

(Pray for me, please, if/when you get the chance to. I’m more “Childish” than “Childlike” right now. Being honest).

So, yeah. Where were we?

Prayer. Let’s pray.

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of My Savior, Yahshua.

You know it’s a new year.

You know where I stand as Your Child.

Forgive me if I am “childish,” instead of “childlike” in faith and trust concerning You.

You know I need so much help here.

My heart is tired and impatient.

I want things for this new year. I wrestle with feeling confident that they can happen for me.

What are Your Plans?

Help me to fully be Your Child.

Heal me and help me. Forgive me for every sin, especially the ones coming from a childish perspective.

I need You.

I cannot do anything without You, including live my life in this New Year.

Be powerfully present in it then.

I give this year to You. I give myself to You.

You can make this year a happy one. But more than that. I know that You can help be to be happy in You.

Don’t stop until You achieve that for me.

Thank You.

I receive it, by faith, In Yahshua’s Name.

Amen.

Happy New Year!

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

(The Texted/Emailed Word) Stirring Up Wrath?

I was a big fan of the AMC series, “Mad Men.”

It depicted the advertising world of Madison Avenue in the 1960s. Sales and persuasion were key.

That meant, the mouth was key.

Persuasion through words.

Words and the mouth. What could possibly go wrong?

Eh.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.”

Proverbs 18:21

Yep.

Words and death. Words and destruction. Words and dishonor.

“Do not be rash with your mouth, And let not your heart utter anything hastily before (The Most High) God. For (YAH) God is in heaven, and you on earth; Therefore, let your words be few.”

Ecclesiastes 5:2

Words be few, huh? That’s a tall order, isn’t it?

How many of us run at the mouth? How many of us say too much?

How many of us have caused wreckage because of what we’ve said?

Words go beyond audible voice. They also extend to the more modern day written word of texting and emailing.

Now, how many of us, are suddenly in a wrath kind of experience?

Misunderstandings? Arguments? War?

A harsh word stirs up wrath.

I have a friend who frequently, when it comes to stuff concerning the words and the mouth, says this:

“They threw the dart.”

Also, scripturally, known as…

“A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Proverbs 15:1

You know how it goes.

The conversation starts out as a conversation. “Normal.”

Normal tone. Normal volume. Normal atmosphere.

Things look “fine.”

And then…

And then…

Offense.

It is challenging enough when it is person-to-person, voice-to-voice, audibly heard.

Sometimes, yeah, yelled.

But what about other forms of communication?

You know, the more “convenient” forms of communication? Texting? Emailing?

Ah, here we go.

Now, we have no nonverbal cues. No facial expression in front of us. No body language. No voice tone.

It’s, seemingly, more sterile than that.

Black type on a white screen or page.

Someone says something. Texts something. Emails something.

It might be said (typed) out of ignorance. It may not be intentionally meant to cause harm. It was said (typed). But immediately…

Offense.

Great.

“Then He said to the disciples, ‘It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come!’”

Luke 17:1

Again…

The written form of communication/conversation can never be underestimated.

For potential harm and, yeah, offense.

Eons ago, people once communicated nonverbally through writing letters.

These letters, with hearts poured out, were written and sent via Pony Express.

It maybe even took weeks for the party to receive the letter.

This was the only way people could communicate with each other.

No phone. No video chat. No email. No text.

It was inconvenient.

However, people of that time probably did not see the inconvenience, largely because this was the only way communication could happen. Important updates. Love letters. Words of wisdom. Handwritten letters.

That’s it.

People accepted that.

I think you know where I am going here.

No, in modern times, we have options. Numerous options, seemingly, for everything.

Including communication.

Email was first. The early days of AOL, dial up internet, and “You’ve Got Mail.”

You could send mail, like the old school, handwritten letters, electronically, through computers. You could send this mail, and the recipient would receive it on that same day. No weeks of waiting for a horse and its rider to deliver it to your front door.

Texting came next, especially after the explosion of Apple I-Phones.

This was even more immediate, therefore, even more convenient.

“Everyone” now has a phone.

Therefore, “everyone” can text immediate messages and information. The recipient receives it within seconds, barring no technical glitches.

This is desirable. And now, because we are spoiled by convenience and fast results, we take it for granted and expect it.

Come on now.

How many of us get impatient as we see the ellipsis, the three dots, in motion, indicating someone is currently typing a response?

How many of us are saying, “Hurry up already!”

I cannot be the only one.

I REFUSE to believe I am the only one.

Yeah, offenses and arguments can easily come from vocal, audible interaction. We are engaged with a person, person-to-person, voice-to-voice.

It may be a stretch to see how Scripture foresaw technology and its issues, centuries ago.

But it did.

Because it is about more than technological options.

It’s about communication.

Therefore, Scripture is relevant, via technology. And its wise advice, likewise, is also relevant.

Guard on mouth.

“Set a guard, O Elohim, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips.”

Psalm 141:3

Direct, face-to-face, voice-to-voice communication benefits from this Psalm’s advice.

Yes, stop the noise, please. Shut the literal mouth, please.

But this scripture extends to nonverbal communication as well.

This has more to do with the pause.

The Holy Pause?

The shutting of the mouth, via stopping the fingers from typing, pause.

Again, how many of us have sent an email or text, out of anger, out of a heated moment?

We send that sucker, and, as we’re sending it, we immediately regret doing so.

There’s no way to call it back, to catch it back.

We’ve been there. We make the regret face.

We know that we have blown it.

Words be few.

“Do not be rash with your mouth. And let not your heart utter anything hastily before (The Most High) God. For (The Most High) God is in heaven, and you on earth; Therefore, let your words be few.”

Ecclesiastes 5:2

The more we talk, the more trouble we can get into.

Hence, Ecclesiastes 5:2.

This also applies to the written form of communication.

Emailing and texting.

Look, I know I am guilty of this: composing and sending the long, epic novel of an email or a text.

And, come one, most of us groan when we receive one of these lengthy messages.

It just feels like too much work, doesn’t it?

Too much drama.

I’m sure that you have heard the etiquette lessons about this stuff.

In its distilled form, it comes down to this.

Email and texting should be about short bits of information.

Giving directions or an address to a location.

Yes or no.

A few words.

Not a diatribe.

And, as I type this, I’m convicted; I have typed many diatribes in my life.

(Abba, help me. Forgive me. Shut the mouth of my fingers).

Long, lengthy, emotional-filled communication should be done directly. Face-to-face. Person-to-person.

Again, directly.

Not removed, like modern technology affords us to be.

And yeah, that’s inconvenient, isn’t it?

We don’t like inconvenience. We like instant results. Instant gratification. Letting loose all our thoughts and opinions.

Scripture has something to say about that as well…

“A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back.”
Proverbs 29:11

Venting.

Long paragraphs of texts and emails.

“Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace; When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.”

Proverbs 17:28

 

Seemingly, no sense of self-control.

Ah, yes, here we are.

Self-control.

It’s listed within the “fruit of the spirit” (Galatians 5:22-23).

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”

Speaking of Spirit…

Like a city broken down without walls.

“Whoever has no rule over his own spirit Is like a city broken down, without walls.”

Proverbs 25:28

Everything starts from the spirit. Our condition, expressed through our words, typed or spoken, is reflected in our spirit.

What kind of walls do we have?

Again, self-control.

So, the quick primer to not stir up emailing and texting wrath?

Pause.

Don’t move. Stay put. Stop. Do nothing with our device, be it things like phone or laptop.

Pray.

ABBA, should I send or delete this? Will I regret sending this?

Allow time.

Barring intense emergency, does this really need to be sent, right here, right now?

Can it wait a few hours?

Maybe even a day?

A day is not forever, even if it feels like it with instantaneous chatting.

Pray some more.

Lather, rinse, repeat, with spiritual oomph. A little more prayer and consideration could not hurt. It might make all the difference. Maybe new insight popped up. Maybe a new warning arose.

Send.

Yes, we can send things. We can trust that we are not in control; He is.

By faith, we send messages, believing He will honor and bless it.

(Of course, send no eggplant emogis, please).

Message is sent. Communication is hopefully blessed.

Let’s pray.

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of Our Savior, Yahshua.

You know the words I am dealing with. Words I have sent and words I have received.

You know what they are.

Forgive me for those words that do not glorify You.

Restore peace where communication, especially through emailing and texting, has caused stress and trouble.

Help me to communicate effectively, the way that You desire.

Let there be peace between myself and any other person as we communicate.

Remove misunderstandings, harsh messages, said out of anger, and anything that attempts to derail Your Will and Plan.

Establish that now.

Thank You for your mercy, guidance, and help.

I receive it all now, in The Name of Yahshua.

Amen.

 

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Speed Potato

“The devil whispered, ‘You’re not strong enough to withstand the storm.’

I whispered back, ‘I AM THE STORM.’”

This quote has circulated in our culture and online. Many social media posts, t-shirts, and coffee mugs tout its declaration.

It’s supposed to be a rallying cry for confidence in the face of adversity and fear.

Most recently, I came across this post on social media:

A cute fluffy-headed cheetah cub looks to its mother, questioning her about predators, about those who would harm it.

Mother Cheetah responds, “My speed potato, we are the predators.”

And then, the fluffy Cutie Pie reflects… “We…ARE?”

This isn’t so much about being a predator. It has more to do with power.

Gym class always made me feel less than.

When I was a kid, we participated in the Presidential Physical Fitness tests on a regular basis.

The goal was to promote health and physical exercise.

For me, the result was… humiliation.

Gym class always made me anxious. I was an overweight and self-conscious child.

Therefore, I approached Gym class with fear, wanting to get things over with as soon as possible. That included these physical fitness tests that, yes, included running.

Running around the football field at least twice. I did not have the stamina for that. I always came in last, lagging behind the other kids.

And then there was the sprinting. The 30-yard dash. Shuttle runs. The shorter sprints, timed to see how fast a kid can run.

Anxiety really kicked in for me here. I felt the pressure.

Therefore, with anxiety fueling my central nervous system, I threw myself into the sprint. I put every bit of force into running. I tried to go as fast as I could.

Doing so, yeah, maybe I was fast. But I had no brakes. Crossing the finish line, unable to stop, I, inevitably, stumbled and fell to the ground, or to the asphalt.

Usually, there was some kind of face plant that I did as well. Going at a high rate of speed, anxious and adrenalized, with no ability to brake, past the finish line?

Yeah, face plant was certain.

And this toppling over, complete with face plant, was a regular occurrence. It didn’t happen only once. It happened every time. Every time.

Races. Sprinting. Speed. Power. Endurance.

These are all things we face in life.

“I returned and saw under the sun that— The race is not to the swift, Nor the battle to the strong, Nor bread to the wise, Nor riches to men of understanding, Nor favor to men of skill; But time and chance happen to them all.”

Ecclesiastes 9:11

Not all of us run a race, be it marathon or physical competition… barring the requisite gym class tortures we had to experience in a school curriculum.

But we all run, stumble, fall, and are in some facet of running “our race.”

Scripture, therefore, is comforting here, especially as we recover from our latest life face plant…

“I returned and saw under the sun that— The race is not to the swift, Nor the battle to the strong, Nor bread to the wise, Nor riches to men of understanding, Nor favor to men of skill; But time and chance happen to them all.”

Ecclesiastes 9:11

We are stronger in The Most High than we realize.

Scripture tells us that “His strength is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Let’s go back to the cheetah.

The wild cats run at a speed of 71 miles per hour. They are known as the fastest land animals, going from 0 to 60mph in just three seconds.

That’s fast, arguably, me- without- brakes- in- gym- class sprints fast.

See for yourself…

Yep, fast.

And, if we just saw that one image, that one moving picture of the accelerated big cat, it would be a black and white case of speed, pure and simple.

But there is also another cheetah reality.

What they SOUND like…

Adorable, huh? Little squeaks? A dangerous predator… squeaks?

Apparently so.

I point this out to state that something that looks like the most dangerous, most intimidating thing in our lives…

Can also “squeak.”

And concerning us, for every disempowered weakness, flaw, insecurity, and limitation, we, conversely, have that power and speed, in and through Him.

“Therefore let us also, seeing we are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, looking unto (Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Jesus the Author and Perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising shame, and hath sat down at the Right Hand of the Throne of (The Most High) God.”

Hebrews 12:1-2

It is one thing to feel great, confident and assured when we are sprinting in power.

It is another thing altogether to squeak a tiny, sweet squeak.

This is where we encounter the power of THIS scripture flowing from our lives…

“But the foolish things of the world did The Most High choose, that the wise He may put to shame; and the weak things of the world did The Most High choose that He may put to shame the strong.”

1 Corinthians 1:27

One more thing about the cheetah, specifically, the little fluffy-headed cheetah cub.

The little one is afraid of predators, not understanding that it was powerful… and a predator… all on its own.

The little one, according to this humorous post, does not see its speed. It only sees its “potato status,” referenced, term of endearment-wise, from Mother Cheetah.

Likewise, The Most High is Our Loving Parent, Who reminds us of, yes, of our vulnerability.

But there is ALSO the reminder of Strength, in HIM!

“Indeed, with your help I can charge against an army; by my YAH’s power I can jump over a wall.”

Psalm 18:29

A big key here? Do not fear.

“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your (YAH) God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My Righteous Right Hand.’”

Isaiah 41:10

So, that’s the challenge, to the “Speed Potato” in all of us.

May we reach the certainty of this scripture in our lives.

May we run with this as we run!

 

“Yahweh is on my side. I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?”

Psalm 118:6

ABBA-

I come to You, in The Name of Our Savior, Yahshua.

You know how well I am running. You know if I am stumbling right now.

You know how I fail to see myself accurately.

You know how I struggle to see myself in You.

Forgive me for doubting You, for arguing with You.

Help me to recognize that You are at work in and through me now.

Help me to run the race You have called me to run, with power, success, and speed.

Be glorified as You move through me.

Thank You.

I receive it, by faith, right now.

In The Name of Yahshua, I accept the Strength and the Speed You have for me.

Amen.

Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse

 

 

What is Recovery? (Thin Enough Book Excerpt)

“‘For I will restore health to you And heal you of your wounds…’”

Jeremiah 30:17

 

What is recovery? (Thin Enough Book Excerpt)

 What is recovery?

(According to ANRED Treatment and Recovery)

 

Recovery is much more than the abandonment of starving and stuffing. At minimum it includes the following:

 

•• Maintenance of normal or near-normal weight

•• In women, regular menstrual periods (not triggered by medication)

•• A varied diet of normal foods (not just low-cal, non-fat, non-sugar items)

•• Elimination or major reduction of irrational food fears

•• Age-appropriate relationships with family members

•• Awareness of cultural demands for unrealistic thinness

•• One or more mutually satisfying friendships with healthy, normal people. Such friendships involve mutual give-and-take and a minimum of caretaking and “parenting” behavior.

•• Age-appropriate interest and participation in romantic relationships

•• Strong repertoire of problem-solving skills

•• Fun activities that have nothing to do with food, weight, or appearance

•• Understanding of the process of choices and consequences

•• Person has a sense of self, plus goals and a realistic plan for achieving them. Is moving towards building a meaningful, fulfilling, and satisfying life.

•• Person has also learned to be kind to self and others, forsaking perfectionism and confronting flaws and disorder with grace and understanding. Person refuses to drive her/himself with criticism and demands for unrealistic performance.

 

ANRED: Treatment and Recovery. <http://www.anred.com/tx.html>.Used with permission.