Assimilation (“IF You Know?”)
Assimilation
(“IF You Know?” Book Excerpt)
“…The Secrecy…
“He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.”
Proverbs 28:13
Adding to that stifling picture, there was the probable reality of toxic secrecy and shame. It’s secret keeping over more than just the abuse that was occurring.
Something, perhaps, more volatile was driving the painful, intense atmosphere my dad grew up in.
It wouldn’t excuse the abuse; there’s no excuse.
But it might explain what existed in that house.
“Like a flitting sparrow, like a flying swallow, So a curse without cause shall not alight.”
Proverbs 26:2
Within the last few years, I have had strong reason to believe my dad and his family may have been Ashkenazi Jewish.
Indeed, I did a DNA test in late 2018, which showed results of an Ashkenazi Jewish presence in my bloodline.
Prior to that, I underwent genetic testing a year earlier, with my breast cancer diagnosis.
The findings? The test results seemed to confirm suspicions I’d held for years.
Besides the expected readings noting my Polish, Russian, and Scandinavian (Mom’s side) heritage, the Ashkenazi result seemed rather a-typical for the setting of my small Midwestern, rural town.
But there it was: science.
The blood does not lie?
“And he said, ‘What hast thou done? The voice of thy brother's blood crieth unto me from the ground.’”
Genesis 4:10
My father’s blood?
Was it speaking?
I wondered if the trauma never spoken of was, indeed, tied to how my relatives may have had to flee the old country because of religious persecution.
Did they flee a pogrom in Russia or in Germany? My paternal grandfather emigrated here, at the age of sixteen, by himself. Where was his family? What became of them?
My young grandfather, seemingly, had no choice but to start life over. In a strange country. I am sure he didn’t speak the language. Who knows how long that took him to learn it.
It is the traditional, well-worn immigrant story of trauma.
And was it further exacerbated as my grandfather, and eventually my paternal grandmother, tried to become Americans, forsake the past, and assimilate?
Was that why “Lutheran” was listed as my dad’s religion on his dog tags?
Did this side of my bloodline become members of the small rural town’s Lutheran church, all to be considered “safe and acceptable?”
This was the best way to assimilate…and NOT be Jewish?
“…there is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed or hidden that will not be made known.”
Matthew 10:26; Luke 12:2
They certainly weren’t a church going family.
“Lutheran” was in denominational name only.
“Name.”
Again, the power of a name.
“Lutheran?”
“Jewish?”
“Acceptable?”
“White?”
“American?”
Concerning the Lutheran denomination, did they, therefore, attend this town’s church to get “confirmed” and, subsequently, stamped as “legitimate?”
Did they feel they were “safe,” hidden from view?
Or were they constantly terrified and traumatized?
I place my bet on that second concept.
When I was growing up, my dad was extremely hostile when it came to “God” and faith.
“…Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven… ‘For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother-in-law.”
Matthew 10:32; 34; 35
Constantly belittling Mom and I about the subject, he forbade us from going to church, up until the years I needed to go for confirmation classes as a teenager.
And that, again, had more to do with public image.
“Assimilation” continues now, with me?
It was about avoiding the small- town gossip over why I wasn’t going through the status quo motions, just like all the other kids my age.
It had nothing to do with my spiritual needs…”
If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Wednesday: “Hump Day?”
“Hump day.” Also known as “Wednesday.”
We have seen our fair share of “hump day” camel gifs and memes…
You get the camel picture already.
Beyond the message of encouraging us to get through the week, because, as the 1980s band Loverboy once sang…
Sorry, I just had to include it. It’s a n earwig for everyone for the rest of the… week, right?
Anyway, the first meme I posted here, set me to thinking.
About not just getting through, but getting- or being- qualified.
“Good enough.”
The “Hump Day” of Wednesday has, built within it, this message that we are not where we want to be, but praise The Most High, we are not where we used to be, work week edition.
Most of us groan at Mondays…
Mondays are the “Straight-A” Student Pressure of the week. The tackling. The conquering. The getting a great start on things.
Yeah, I’m tired just typing it.
And here is where, maybe, you and I, in the faith community, have bumped up against this little nugget…
“The Most High doesn’t call the qualified. He qualifies the called.”
Did it just provoke a spontaneous eyeroll for you?
What can I say? I love a good Judge Judy eye roll. I’m only human.
Exactly!
Which is WHY I’m writing about this Hump Day stuff, beyond the week situation.
It’s macro, notjust “week micro.”
“Despise not the day of small beginnings.”
“Do not despise these small beginnings, for Elohim rejoices to see the work begin…”
Zechariah 4:10
In terms of translating scripture to “days of the week,” Zechariah 4:10 smacks of Tuesday to me.
I mean, because, let’s face it, most of us don’t really feel that great about our Monday situations.
But Tuesdays?
Well, spiritually, maybe Tuesday is about the small beginnings, getting underway.
And, I guess, cats, in the office, wearing glasses, a tie, and drinking coffee.
Realistic.
But seriously, if I can be here.
Projects, and slogging through the weekdays, often do not show up as spectacular lights ands sound. We don’t seem to think that anything is really working or making a difference.
Therefore, we hang on, waiting for Wednesday, at if it holds some consolation prize promise.
Along with all the camel gifs and memes…
Are you still with me?
I promise, I’m going somewhere here, as weird and “around the houses” as it may be.
Let’s look at this Lady here.
She looks… refined. Educated. Classy. Hey, I mean, she’s wearing a high collar blouse, right?
Because this speaks to not overestimating or underestimating things, us included.
“The Most High does not call the qualified. He qualifies the called.”
“Not to think of ourselves more highly…”
“For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but think of yourself with sober judgment, according to the measure of faith The Most High has given you.”
Romans 12:3
What are we relying on? Our degrees? Our resumes? Our education? Our status levels?
Yet, come on, be honest, like this Blouse Lady, how many of us, who have been there, done that, gotten the education, and achieved the status, are still trying to spell “Hump Day” correctly?
“Wed…is S before N…?”
Come on. I’m not the only one with this battle.
Here’s, therefore, a great time to introduce the imperfect bridge from Wednesday’s “Hump Day” to that of Thursday…
Ah, here we go again. Chasing, chasing, chasing…
“But I press…”
“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which (Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Christ Jesus took hold of me.”
Philippians 3:12
Not that we have already obtained… what?
Goals, perfection, working for that weekend?
But there is value in“the keeping going.”
Wednesday, “Hump Day,” marks time and progress, literally, weekly, or symbolically.
And trudging through time, with our Friday eye on the Prize, can get us so fixated on “That day.”
…that we miss something deeper.
And here is where I get more spiritual in my musing. Buckle up.
Is The Prize really a day at all?
Is The Prize connection with Him?
Faith in HIM?
“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which (Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Christ Jesus took hold of me.”
Philippians 3:12
It’s a challenge. Sometimes, it’s an all-out war.
Nevertheless, it’s real. It’s a living organism, this faith thing. Day by day, “Hump Day,” or any other.
Where are we, in that time process, moving through the days?
We are His Called. It is not about performance.
It IS about relationship and faith.
How’s our week going with THAT?
Did I make any sense?
Well, if not, please allow me to trot out this verse…
“Uses the foolish to confound the wise…”
“But The Most High chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; Elohim chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.”
1 Corinthians 1:27
Foolish thing? Me?
The wise confounded? Is that you?
“Selah,” meaning, “Pause and think about that?”
Any of that going on?
Yes?
Well, if not, enjoy the memes and gifs.
He’s still taking you“from glory to glory” (2 Corinthians 3:18), day by day, in your week.
Enjoy the camels as you go!
Let’s pray, anyway.
Abba Father-
I come to You, in The Name of Yahshua, My Savior.
I come to You with my week. You know where I am, IN it.
You know how I’m slogging through, going through the motions.
Help me, no matter what day it is. No matter what “kind” of day it is.
Forgive me for rushing and for not paying attention to You IN it, as I need to do.
You know how I’m caught up, pressured, overwhelmed, and stressed.
I know that my solution is not “the weekend.”
It is You.
Help me to live that out, day by day.
I need a lot of help here.
Thank You for helping me.
Day by day.
Amen.
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Good Old Abe? (“IF You Know?”)
Good Old Abe? (IF You Know?”)
“For there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; neither hid, that shall not be known.”
Luke 12:2
No, I don’t mention Abraham Lincoln in my book, “IF You Know?”
But his presence is there, very much of a contributing “question mark,” as I have tried to discover the truth of my backstory, and that of my family.
I question both sides, but, concerning “the 16th President,” I focus on my mother’s side.
Supposedly, I am related to Abraham Lincoln, a “sixth cousin, twice removed.”
Whatever that means.
When I was a kid, there was some excitement in my small rural town, and in my small rural town elementary school.
Bruce Hanks visited our classroom. He was a well-known Lincoln impersonator, who spoke to schools and organizations about “the life of Lincoln.”
And further selling it?
He was also related to Abraham Lincoln (The “Hanks” side of the family).
(Also a bit of fun trivia? The actor, Tom Hanks, is ALSO supposedly related to this “Hanks” side of the family).
Anyway, when my mother got wind of Bruce Hanks’ visit, she sent me to school with the supposed family ancestry, mapping out how Abe and I were “cousins.”
I showed my teacher first, and then, she let Mr. Hanks know about my genealogy.
Long story short, I was called up to the front of the classroom, to speak with him about my family findings. The local paper was there, covering his visit. And so, photos were snapped. These two, right here…
At one point, as I showed Mr. Hanks my family tree, he remarked that I was more closely related to Abraham Lincoln than he was.
I don’t know about that for sure.
But, in keeping with “the discovery” that day, he playfully bestowed upon me the stove pipe hat that he wore, as part of how costume.
And it sank over much of my face, as you can see in the picture.
The local paper quipped, “it didn’t quite fit…”
Nope.
Bruce Hanks was a Sequoia of a man, height-wise. He had to have been at least, oh, six foot, five?
Anyway, years later, as I have learned to ask more questions about so much of the mystery of my family origins, Abraham Lincoln is still a part of my life, and my questions marks.
There is some kind of presence, or, at least, a question of a presence, TO Him.
Curious questions surround him. And not just from me.
Check this article out…
Was Abraham Lincoln Black? The Surprising Debate About His Race
See it as blasphemy? Hogwash?
Speculation?
Or IS there something THERE?
Is there more to it than what we have been taught?
“It is the glory of The Most High to conceal a thing: but the honor of kings is to search out a matter.”
Proverbs 25:2
Just curiously asking, as it has been more than 2 or 3 witnesses for me…
“…In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.”
2 Corinthians 13:1
(Prayer Excerpt from “IF You Know?”)
ABBA FATHER-
I come to You, in The Name of Your Son, Our Savior, Yahshua.
I stand in the gap with anyone reading these words, that You would be in complete command of them, and what they mean for my brother and sister.
You know what You have called Your Word to accomplish (Isaiah 55:11).
You know that we are finite beings, and have failed You: in heart, in motives, in understanding, in struggles, in identity, in wisdom, in ability.
Forgive us for not seeking You, seeking to know Who You are.
Help Us, ABBA, to see, to seek, and to Know You, “in Spirit and in Truth.” (John 4:24).
Let there be no discord, division, confusion, or harm, brought by the questions, concepts, and the scriptures we explore (we are to search daily Your scriptures, according to Acts 17:11).
Establish only Your True Identity, Clarity, Confirmation, Revelation, Love, Peace, Joy, Forgiveness, and Freedom.
We endeavor to know more about ourselves and our mysteries.
But we yearn to know Who YOU are to each of us.
Establish that now.
Purify, lead, guide, heal, help, protect, save, and empower us in this discovery process.
Only help us to draw us closer to You.
Draw closer to each of us, with each unanswered question in our hearts and spirits.
May this process we engage in truly glorify You.
We thank You for all You are doing.
We declare it finished and sealed.
In the Name of Your Son, Yahshua,
Amen.
“Teach me thy way… I will walk in Thy Truth: unite my heart to fear Thy Name.”
Psalm 86:11
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
The Dress (Thin Enough)
You are Already a Lily! (Thin Enough)
“Consider how the wildflowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.”
Luke 12:27
The Dress
Two words can strike fear and unrealistic expectations for many of us ladies out there.
The dress.
It’s probably a safe bet to say there has been at least one which has plagued us. It may be that prom dress, eradicating high school awkwardness. It may be the fairytale torture known as the perfect wedding dress, transforming us into the bride to end all brides.
It may also be any variety of special occasion dresses: the high school reunion showstopper, the “special event” evening gown, created to dazzle or the pageant dress, guaranteeing us a tiara.
The dress.
The notorious, nail biting, nerve-racking, insanity creating dress. Been there? If not, be patient, you probably will be.
There have been a lot of desperate diets and exercise regimes plotted, all in the name of the big dress. We push, pull, cinch, torture, starve, and manipulate ourselves into all kinds of predicaments.
Like when I was a bridesmaid at my cousin’s wedding.
“...I really started obsessing the two weeks prior to the wedding. Looking back on my
diary entries, I wrote a repetitive string of comments like, ‘I’m not going to eat today or tomorrow,’ and ‘I can’t blow it now. I’m so close.’ ...
...I tried on the dress and discovered that’s all it was—just a dress. Yes, it was hanging on me, but it didn’t really mean anything anymore. I was too exhausted for it to mean anything to me. I had to pin the sides of the dress with safety pins. It was hanging off from my 20-inch waist (18 inches, if I held in my breath)...
...People stammered things like, ‘Sheryle, you look, pretty’ and ‘My, you’re thin. I didn’t recognize you.’ They obviously felt uncomfortable saying it. A guy cousin of mine said something like, ‘Man, you’re thin,’ (two beats of awkward silence), ‘but—you—you look—good.’ He said it to me like I was in danger of dying right there.
It was a long day. I focused most of my concentration on just staying vertical and not fainting. I had accomplished my goal; I was skinny for this wedding. I was just too exhausted and hollow to enjoy it...”
(Excerpt taken from Cruse’s book,“Thin Enough: My Spiritual Journey Through the Living Death Of An Eating Disorder”)
Years later, that obsession was only compounded when it came to my own wedding dress. Although I was no longer at that bridesmaid low weight, I was still obsessed with everything I put in my mouth two weeks, leading up to my “big day.”
Have you been there and done that? What have you done for that big dress?
Are you and I simply dieting or are we worshipping an idol? Diets tend to start out innocently enough.
“I’ll just lose five pounds.”
But how many of us, find out, all too late, the simple diet has become the torturous, hard taskmaster?
Eating disorders “suddenly” appear from nowhere, stealing so much from our lives. But they didn’t happen overnight.
No, it’s more insidious than that. We’re warned to stay vigilant against subtle lies and attacks which can sneak up on us all too quickly:
“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.”
1 Peter 5:8
That includes eating disorders; no one is immune. It can all start with a thought.
One thought.
And that one thought leads to another thought which eventually leads us astray.
So, what are we thinking?
Is the big dress, the big thing or the big image becoming too big in our lives? Has it become our God? If so, that’s idolatry. No golden calf being worshipped, but it’s still an idol, isn’t it?
We’re spiritual beings, loved and created by The Most High for relationship with Him.
Accept no substitutes. They never work, anyway.
Like my bridesmaid or my wedding dresses, when I put them on, they didn’t magically perfect my life and make me blissfully happy. They were just dresses; they couldn’t save me.
What are you and I counting on to save us? Our idols, will only disappoint us, at best, and destroy us, at worst.
“What profiteth the graven image that the maker thereof hath graven it; the molten image, and a teacher of lies, that the maker of his work trusteth therein, to make dumb idols? Woe unto him that saith to the wood, Awake; to the dumb stone, Arise, it shall teach! Behold, it is laid over with gold and silver, and there is no breath at all in the midst of it.”
Habakkuk 2:18-19
“Their sorrows shall be multiplied that hasten after another god...”
Psalms16:4
It’s sobering to see what heart damage can come from our idols: addictions, compulsions, and disorders. You know, issues.
“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”
Proverbs 4:23
But thankfully, we can go to Elohim with them…
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of The Most High.”
Romans 12:2
Can we conform to that? Can we rethink what we’re thinking?
It’s worth thinking about.
The dress is just a dress; the thing is just a thing.
But Elohim is The Most High, Who loves us and has the power to bless us beyond measure.
That reality fits us better than anything else ever could.
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
This Dangerous Square: Don’t Step On It?
“I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”
Psalm 139:14
I once came across an image of two little girls looking down at a bathroom scale. This was the caption:
“Don’t step on it. It makes you cry.”
Troubling.
Indeed, as a child, I had my own painful association it. There was once a time when I only saw a weird square in our bathroom. I didn’t give it much attention; I was more interested in the blue windmill stencil designs lining the tub and my rubber ducky. It was just a square, taking up space.
However, suddenly, Mom placed me on this square- and I became conscious of what I weighed. Apparently, it wasn’t a good digit as, with more frequency, I needed to get on this square. Now, suddenly, I had a “weight problem.”
And ever since, I no longer see just a square.
Throughout my childhood and adolescence, it dictated my worth, which was never good enough, always too big and always too heavy.
That drove me to eating disorders, with the hope as I became more punishing of myself, more “dedicated,” well, then my two-digit weight as a young adult would mean triumph. It, however, never really did become that reality, of course. Because I could always lose more weight and somehow, magically, “be better.”
On and on and on I went, into my own hell...
It’s incredible what we think of this square. It’s supercharged with value, guilt, fear, loathing and importance. A staple in so many homes, it yells at us to think less of ourselves.
Right this second, in many a bathroom, there are people, of all ages, of both genders and from all walks of life who are subjecting themselves to a cruel verdict. Depending upon the numbers which appear, many will decide if they are worthwhile…or worthless.
We give it that power.
We don’t have to, however.
We could choose to give something else power in determining our value: The Most High’s Word.
“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”
Philippians 4:8
What if we measured ourselves by the following?
“Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast doves' eyes.”
Song of Solomon 1:15
“O my dove…let me see your form…for your form is lovely.”
Song of Solomon 2:14
“Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.”
Song of Solomon 4:7
Elohim created our steps for far better things than to settle for what this square device tells us!
“The steps of a good man are ordered by Elohim: and He delights in his way.”
Psalms 37:2
What if we stepped into these scriptures instead?
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Bodily Exercise (Thin Enough)
“For bodily exercise is of a little profit, but holiness is profitable for everything,
holding the promise of the present life and of the one coming.”
1 Timothy 4:8
(Book Excerpt From Thin Enough)…
It was twelve o’ clock midnight, and the alarm blared.
“Get up! You must do this!” yelled a voice from somewhere deep within me. Slowly rising from my bed, I avoided the light-headed dizziness and concentrated on every movement.
Already exhausted, I began this day as I did most others, with a collapsing spell. Thud! “How many calories are burned in a drop thud anyway?” I thought to myself as I accepted the collapse as a part of my routine. It was merely the price I had to pay to be nineteen years old, 5’4” and 80 pounds. That kind of thinness wouldn’t happen unless I made it happen!
I obeyed my inner drill sergeant and stumbled in the dark to my exercise equipment. In the beginning, I had enjoyed the sense of accomplishment, the toned body, and the natural endorphin-high that exercise brought me. Somehow that had morphed into the morning installment of my daily punishment.
Driven by fear, I believed my critical inner voice when it told me things such as:
“No one will ever want you unless you’re thin, beautiful, and perfect, you know!”
“You’re not good enough! Who do you think you’re kidding by doing this? But you’d better not stop!”
“You have to finish this. You won’t be able to live with yourself if you don’t.”
The next six punishing hours were a thud fest. I tried to find the emotional strength to deal with my inner commandant’s orders and enough physical strength to keep from fainting again. Collapsing was inevitable, though. I saw it as the price I needed to pay to have perfection and worth.
Each morning, I dreaded and feared the fainting. I knew it would happen. Would I be out for three seconds, thirty seconds, or thirty minutes this morning? I tried to control where I fainted. When I couldn’t, I’d collapse on the equipment, hitting my head on a barbell or bike pedal. Would my mother discover me lying on the floor? I didn’t want to face her “I’m surprised you’re still alive” comments. I prayed not to get caught.
I was fortunate this morning. I was only out for a few seconds. “Okay, now,” I’d coach myself, “come up slowly from the floor.” I tried to make no sudden movements as I’d crawl from the family room into the kitchen…
… I felt myself falling to the floor as my vision turned black. Fainting was a welcome escape. Unconscious, I didn’t have to think about how fat I was, how much I wanted food, how much God hated me, or how much I wanted it all to end. Each time I woke up, I wanted to just lie there on the floor instead. Life was too difficult and too painful…
… Diary Entry…
Got up, sit-ups, weights… worked on the trampoline for 2 hours, 50 minutes—great—did extra sit-ups… I want to lose more weight, though. Before history class, I saw Stacy, and she said I looked different—thinner. Yeah!’”…
Don’t Lean, Squirrel!
“Trust in Elohim with all your heart. And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.”
Proverbs 3:6
What Does He Look Like?
“It is the glory of (YAH) God to conceal a thing: but the honor of kings is to search out a matter.”
Proverbs 25:2
There’s more to Him than meets our eye.
“His head and hair were white like wool, as white as snow, and His eyes like a flame of fire.”
Revelation 1:14
“To the angel of the church in Thyatira write: These are the words of the Son of God, whose eyes are like blazing fire and whose feet are like burnished bronze.”
Revelation 2:18
Ask Him about Who He is.
What does He look like?
If You Know?: Cruse, Sheryle: 9798272042019: Amazon.com: Books
The Great Physician
“Who forgives all your iniquities; Who heals all your diseases;”
Psalm 103:3
As a cancer survivor, I am used to doctor’s appointments. I spend enough time in exam and waiting rooms.
Those of us who are people of faith are familiar with this scripture…
“But when Yahshua heard that, He said unto them, ‘They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick.’”
Matthew 9:12; Luke 5:31
Doctors.
“Being sick.”
“Getting well.”
“Getting healed.”
I spend my time, as I wait for appointments and go about my “survivorship,” such as it is, thinking about these words.
I now can relate to “the woman with the issue of blood,” for all the doctors, appointments, blood draws, tests, procedures, and the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual pain and exhaustion I have experienced.
“And a woman was there who had suffered from bleeding for twelve years. She had borne much agony under the care of many physicians and had spent all she had, but to no avail. Instead, her condition had only grown worse.
When the woman heard about Yahshua, she came up through the crowd behind Him and touched His cloak. For she kept saying, ‘If only I touch His garments, I will be healed.’ Immediately her bleeding stopped, and she sensed in her body that she was healed of her affliction.
At once Yahshua was aware that power had gone out from Him. Turning to the crowd, He asked, ‘Who touched My garments?’
His disciples answered, “You can see the crowd pressing in on You, and yet You ask, ‘Who touched Me?’”
But He kept looking around to see who had done this. Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell down before Him trembling in fear, and she told Him the whole truth.
‘Daughter,’ said Yahshua, ‘your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be free of your affliction.’”
Mark 5:25-34
Affliction.
I’ve had more than one. How about you?
I have a special soft spot in my heart for Mark 5.
It first exploded into my life thirty-one years ago.
My rededication experience, which was heavily influenced through my eating disorders.
As I was seeking The Most High, as I was reading more about my Savior, I, inevitably, came across “Jairus’ Daughter (Mark 5:35-43).
“And besought Him greatly, saying, ‘My little daughter lieth at the point of death: I pray you, come and lay thy hands on her, that she may be healed; and she shall live.”
Mark 5:23
That account confronted the hopelessness of my eating disorders. And the shame and the fear I had dealing with it at the time.
I saw my hopeless self, in Jairus’ daughter.
I saw my Savior telling me, “Talitha Cumi.”(“Damsel, I say to you, arise”).
I have written, spoken, and thought about Jairus’ daughter a lot over the years.
Scripture really has a way of sticking with you.
Now, however, yes, I think about the other “damsel,” the woman with the issue of blood.
I consider her to be just as much of a “damsel in distress” as that of Jairus’ Daughter.
She is just as in need of The Great Physician as that of that young girl.
Both females’ lives look hopeless.
One is dead. The other has no quality of life.
And now, being a cancer survivor, I spend time, thought, and energy on “quality of life.”
I prefer to keep my interaction with physicians to a “bare necessity.”
And yeah, that “bare necessity” still feels like it is too much.
In all my cancer-related experiences, it is not lost on me how “the woman with the issue of blood” showed up on the scene FIRST before Jairus’ Daughter.
I dealt with eating disorder stuff before cancer.
But, through “the woman with the issue of blood,” FAITH was central and active.
Jairus’ Daughter, let’s face it, before Our Messiah showed up, looked to be only taking a forever dirt nap. We don’t see the twelve-year old girl’s faith.
Maybe we weren’t supposed to…
“When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.”
1 Corinthians 13:11
I confess that I get fidgety and itchy about this scripture.
What, exactly, constitutes, “a grown up?”
Has my faith in The Great Physician “grown up?”
To be determined.
But The Great Physician means something else to me than He did through Jairus’ Daughter.
Is it just mortality thoughts at work?
Aging?
Or is it more?
I hope and pray it’s more.
How about you?
Are you waiting for a doctor’s appointment, or for a slew of them?
How many physicians have you had to endure?
Were any of them “great?”
“Heal me, O Elohim, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for You are my praise.”
Jeremiah 17:14
I have faith that He is still at work. He’s healing me in unusual ways, that maybe don’t seem obvious.
But healing is happening.
It is for you as well.
Let’s pray.
Abba-
I come to You, in The Name of The Master, My Savior, Yahshua.
I come to You, with my issue.
You know what it is.Doctors maybe have not been able to fix it.
Maybe they were not supposed to.
Maybe I am a case for “The Great Physician.”
I seek Him now.
Heal me.
Only You know exactly what that means.
Forgive me and help me.
You know the struggle has been long.
I need You.
Thank You for Your Healing.
I accept and glorify You for it.
I receive it, by faith.
In The Name of Yahshua, I pray.
Amen
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Examine Yourself (Communion)
IF We Examine Ourselves.
Communion is about more than bread and wine/grape juice.
How many of us bypass “the exam?”
1 Corinthians 11:26-32…
“For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim The Master’s death until He comes.”
Verse 26
“So then, whoever eats the bread or drinks the cup of The Master in an unworthy manner will be guilty of sinning against the Body and Blood of The Master”
Verse 27
“Everyone ought to examine themselves before they eat of the bread and drink from the cup.”
Verse 28
“For those who eat and drink without discerning the Body of The Master eat and drink judgment on themselves.”
Verse 29
“That is why many among you are weak and sick, and a number of you have fallen asleep.”
Verse 30
“But if we were more discerning with regard to ourselves, we would not come under such judgment.”
Verse 31
“Nevertheless, when we are judged in this way by (Elohim) the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be finally condemned with the world.”
Verse 32
www.whatishisname.com/name-the-issue/poured-out-for-many
Good Gifts
“…how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him!”
Matthew 7:11
Eyes To and Fro (Ms. Googly Eyes)…
“Searching to and fro…”
“For the eyes of Elohim run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward Him…”
2 Chronicles 16:9
Can you imagine The Most High, The Creator of Everything, doing that for you right now?
Wanting to help you out THAT much?
Recently, my husband and I adopted two kittens.
Here are the baby pictures…
And, of course, in adopting kittens, toys need to also be bought.
Playtime will not be denied.
So, with some of their, “starter toys,” there was this thing.
I call it, “Ms. Googly Eyes,” because I don’t know how to describe it.
It is not mouse or fish-shaped, like so many of her other toys.
It’s pink and furry, with those two eyeballs. Exactly, what kind of creature, in nature, is that supposed to resemble?
Anyway, the girls love it. It has wound up in and behind a lot of furniture.
It took some searching and reaching for it WAAAAY out of reach to get it, to take pics of it, to illustrate my point.
In all the seeking to find this toy, lodged in and behind places that are hard to get to, I thought about Him searching for us. Right now. How does He want to help us? Right now.
“For the eyes of Elohim run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward Him…”
2 Chronicles 16:9
That concerns you. Do you need help?
He wants to help you with whatever you’re facing.
And ANOTHER THING about Eyes…
“But as it is written: ‘Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man The things which Elohim has prepared for those who love Him.’”
1 Corinthians 2:9
How can He blow your mind AND your eyesight?
Find out.
Let’s Ask Him!
Abba-
We come to You now, in The Name of Your Son, Our Savior, Yahshua.
We know that You see us. You see our lives, everything that is going on with them.
You want to help us. And we want Your Help.
Do what only You can do for us.
You know EXACTLY what’s going on.
Forgive us for any sins that have gotten in the way of the help You want to give us.
You know where we are.
In this moment, we search for and ask for You to reveal Yourself TO us!
Thank You for helping us.
Amen.
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Whose Mind Is Stayed Upon Him
Whose Mind Is Stayed on Him
“You will keep in perfect peace the steadfast of mind, because he trusts in You.”
Isaiah 26:3
What’s on our mind?
And more importantly, WHO is on our minds?
George Harrison, Of Beatles’ fame, had a song out, in the later 1980s.
And yeah, it’s secular.
“All things were made through Him, and without Him was not anything made that was made.”
John 1:3
But the point CAN be made and turned towards Him Fully!
Turn now! Be Blessed and at Peace!
Butterfly Needles (Cancerventures)
Butterfly Needles (Cancerventures)
Just ask for butterfly needles. Go easy on your veins.
“You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask.”
James 4:2
(Cancerventures Book Excerpt)
…Just Ask:
First, a tip about the lab, the place where all dreaded blood draws are done.
In a conversation with Joy a couple of weeks before my appointment, I asked if it were possible to have a certain nurse draw my blood for this scary CA 27.29 test.
Yes, it is! The art of the ask!
So, I requested that a note be made in my chart, summoning my angel nurse of butterfly needles to do those early 7:30 a.m. honors.
This angel gets it on the first stick. A 25- gauge butterfly needle (because of my teeny, squirmy veins), administered to the top of my left hand, in the vein right above my wrist bone, and voilà! In and out, little pain, no pin cushion.
But I initially thought this request of mine was too fussy, even by my standards.
(In a British accent) “Yes, Alfred, please bring me my personal bloodwork nurse. Have her meet me on the terrace.”
But no, clinics do comply with such a request.
The lesson here: when, in doubt, ask. Just ask. You never know what is possible. Maybe you could get your preferred individual instead of being at the mercy of a potential hatchet person. Just ask…”
Amazon.com: Cancerventures: Tales of a Diagnosed Woman eBook : Cruse, Sheryle: Kindle Store
Let The Word Do The Work
Let the Word Do the Work.
Isaiah 55:8-11:
8“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
9“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.
10“For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven,
And do not return there,
But water the earth,
And make it bring forth and bud,
That it may give seed to the sower
And bread to the eater,
11So shall My word be that goes forth from My mouth;
It shall not return to Me void,
But it shall accomplish what I please,
And it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.”
“Work The Word.”
www.whatishisname.com/name-the-issue/let-the-word-do-the-work
“Gripes Go Up.”
The Word, “Gripe” means to complain or protest.
Human beings are notorious for doing that.
We complain… a lot.
I did more than enough of that this morning.
Most of it was laid out in my prayers.
The ideal is that there is nothing, but praise, worship, thanksgiving, and beautiful music sung and proclaimed as we focus on The Most High.
Maybe, like Disney’s Snow White, we even have woodland animals following us around, for further impact.
The scenery is beautiful. And furry.
Yep, that is not me.
I know myself too well.
The film, “Saving Private Ryan” has a scene that always stuck with me.
So much so, it’s what I’m writing about now.
The soldiers, under their Commanding Officer’s orders, ask why he doesn’t complain to them about what’s going on.
The Commanding Officer’s response?
“Gripes go up.”
And it immediately reminded me of the following scripture…
“If I were hungry, I would not tell you, for all the world is Mine and everything in it.”
Psalm 50:12
That is the ULTIMATE COMMANDING OFFICER’S response.
Now, this can make us scratch our heads. The Almighty? The Most High?
Isn’t He supposed to be completely omniscient?
He has no needs because He is The Most High?
It’s hard for us to think that He would even be hungry.
He’s above human needs, right?
It doesn’t affect Him, right?
I mean, the second part of Psalm 50:12…
“…for all the world is Mine and everything in it.”
With that being the case, The Most High, then, is more than capable of making Himself a snack.
But it goes beyond just food and appetite.
If we look closer at the scripture, we see that it’s about something deeper: relationship and connection, yes, WITH The Most High, The Creator of all that is in the world.
The Most High loves.
That means that He can be hurt?
Yes, He’s all-powerful. Yes, He loves.
And if we don’t return that love?
He becomes hurt?
Does that sound ridiculous?
Why would it be seen that way?
Scripture, again, shows us part of the answer…
“We love because He first loved us.”
1 John 4:19
He started it.
He started the whole ball rolling with this relationship thing.
And John 3:16 gives further fuel to that love- desire- for- connection-relationship thing.
“For The Most High so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
He loves. He gave.
It sounds “relational” to me.
And He knows all about us, even if we are completely clueless about Him.
“You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.”
Psalm 139:2
“But as for me, Elohim, You know my heart. You see me and test my thoughts.”
Jeremiah 12:3
He knows us. He loves us.
He loved us FIRST.
Scripture tells us that we are made in His Image (Genesis 1:27).
So, why would He not get hurt, like we get hurt, when love and thoughtfulness are not reciprocated?
He loves. He gives.
He has constant mercy extended to us…
“The faithful love of Elohim never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Lamentations 3:22-23
To me, it looks and sounds like He really wants a relationship with us.
So, it would be obvious to presume we’d gravitate right towards Him, right?
Well…
“As it is written: ‘There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks Elohim. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.’”
Romans 3:10-12
Yeah, that’s not looking great for us, is it?
We suck, in fact, at this relationship with The Most High.
It’s no wonder why He wouldn’t tell us that He’s hungry.
And He CERTAINLY wouldn’t tell us about the things weighing on His heart, right?
Still...
“For He knows how weak we are; He remembers we are only dust.”
Psalm 103:14
He knows that we need so much help.
Therefore, Yahshua.
Our Savior is the much-needed Bridge to even come close to The Father…
“…‘I am the Way and the Truth and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.’”
John 14:6
Relationships. They are challenging. Many of us struggle WITH them.
Yet Our Father wants connection with us.
He knows about our relationship issues, all our issues.
He still loves.
He still desires connection.
He may not “gripe” to us, even as we communicate so many complaints in our prayers, if we seek Him at all.
But He wants our hearts turned to and connected with Him, nonetheless.
Relationships often start with talking.
Let’s keep it simple.
Many of us get tripped up by the word, “prayer.”
Just talk to Him.
Let’s “talk” to Him now.
ABBA-
I come to You right now, in The Name of Your Son, My Savior, Yahshua.
You know how I interact with You, if I even do at all.
You know how “one-sided” it may be.
I know that You desire to love, to know, and to connect with me deeply.
I do not reciprocate that back to You.
Forgive me.
Forgive me for only “griping,” for only complaining.
I need a lot of help to connect with You, in a relationship WITH You.
Help me with that now.
Help me to know, to understand you, to communicate with You.
Forgive me for all my sins.
I turn to You. I accept the price Your Son, Yahshua, My Savior paid for me.
It wasn’t just to forgive my sins.
It was to be in relationship with You.
Help me, right now, to get better at doing that.
To not just “gripe,” but to love You and connect with You.
Thank You for loving me, and for wanting a relationship with me. It is a High Honor.
I, by faith, come to You now, desiring a close relationship with You.
Thank You for responding to me.
I receive it, by faith, in The Name of Yahshua,
Amen.
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Sorry, Body
I recently caught a podcast, in which an eating disorder therapist mentioned how her young son bumped into some furniture, and made the comment, “Sorry Body.”
Out of the mouth of babes, huh?
“No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as (Yahshua Ha-Mashiach) Christ cares for the church.”
Ephesians 5:29
In all the forgiveness issues we are challenged by, in forgiving others, and forgiving ourselves, have we realized just how much we need to apologize to our very beings?
We were created intentionally.
I’m providing the following Psalm, in its entirety, because it screams loudly OF His intention concerning EACH ONE OF US.
“1 O Elohim, You have searched me
and known me.
2You know when I sit and when I rise;
You understand my thoughts from afar.
3You search out my path and my lying down;
You are aware of all my ways.
4Even before a word is on my tongue,
You know all about it, O Elohim.
5You hem me in behind and before;
You have laid Your hand upon me.
6Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7Where can I go to escape Your Spirit?
Where can I flee from Your presence?
8If I ascend to the heavens, You are there;
if I make my bed in Sheol, You are there.
9If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle by the farthest sea,
10even there Your hand will guide me;
Your right hand will hold me fast.
11If I say, ‘Surely the darkness will hide me,
and the light become night around me’—
12even the darkness is not dark to You,
but the night shines like the day,
for darkness is as light to You.
13For You formed my inmost being;
You knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14I praise You,
for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Marvelous are Your works,
and I know this very well.
15My frame was not hidden from You
when I was made in secret,
when I was woven together
in the depths of the earth.
16Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all my days were written in Your book
and ordained for me
before one of them came to be.
17How precious to me are Your thoughts, O Elohim,
how vast is their sum!
18If I were to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand;
and when I awake,
I am still with You.
19O Elohim, that You would slay the wicked—
away from me, you bloodthirsty men—
20who speak of You deceitfully;
Your enemies take Your name in vain.
21Do I not hate those who hate You, O Elohim,
and detest those who rise against You?
22I hate them with perfect hatred;
I count them as my enemies.
23Search me, O Elohim, and know my heart;
test me and know my concerns.
24See if there is any offensive way in me;
lead me in the way everlasting.”
Psalm 139
NONE of that Psalm was apologetic. None of that Psalm minimized our value, of how it is unique, inherent, and unable to be duplicated.
We are so loved and valued by The Almighty.
“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”
Isaiah 43:4
“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”
Isaiah 41:9
Our Father. Creator of Everything.
He IS that intentional about us, in His Love, Design, and Purpose for us.
He does not apologize for who He made, including you, right now, no matter how harshly you regard yourself.
Yeah, I’d say, at least, we owe our bodies an apology, but, more than that.
“Sorry, Body.”
We owe our very beings an apology as well. Spirit, Soul, Mind, AND Body.
We owe The Most High an apology, also.
Let’s Pray.
Abba-
We come to You now, in The Name of Yahshua, Your Son, Our Savior.
You know how we have thought of and spoken about ourselves.
Your Creation.
Your Child.
You know how dishonoring and harmful that has been.
Forgive us.
We need Your Help to see ourselves accurately, the way that You do.
We have not done that in our lives.
You know the consequences which have arisen from that choice.
Help us to know, love, and understand You better, to accept ourselves through Your Sight of us.
We need so much help in that area.
Lead, love, and guide us, right where we are right now.
Thank You, that we are the embodiment of Psalm 139. Help us to live that victorious declaration in our lives.
Thank You.
In The Name of Yahshua, we pray.
Amen.
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
He is Not Here
He is not here.
“He is not here; He has risen, just as He said. Come and see the place where He lay.”
Matthew 28:6
Memories are tricky things, aren’t they?
This is my second Resurrection Sunday without my mother being alive.
And I’m not sure where I’m at.
Where are you?
“…‘Where are you?’”
Genesis 3:9
The Most High asks the question then. He asks it now.
When it comes to Resurrection Sunday, which was her favorite holiday, I often associate my mother with Easter Lilies.
She had to have one of those potted floral configurations each year. The maximum number of bulbs, preferably, unopened until the big Sunday.
Then, I guess, they had better bloom like crazy, screaming Spring!
Last year, and this year, yes, I got an Easter Lily. There are six bulbs on this year’s version. Only one is starting to bloom right now as I type.
But this year, another memory hits me. Mom and I, many years ago, had matching gold cross necklaces. The feature that was prominent about this jewelry was that the silhouette of Our Savior was “cut out.”
It was kind of like this image I found online…
“He is not here; He has risen, just as He said. Come and see the place where He lay.”
Matthew 28:6
Mom always raved about it. That encouraged her, because it was a literal symbol of Him “not being there.”
He was “elsewhere.”
He was “arisen.”
That’s a powerful place to be.
“Here, There, Where, Elsewhere…”
Where are we?
How many of us feel lost, somehow?
Big lost?
Little lost?
Sorta lost?
Lost can cover a lot of territory.
“…‘Where are you?’”
Genesis 3:9
He knows EXACTLY where we are.
John 3:16 highlights how Our Savior is Our GPS Locator.
He is precise in tracking our whereabouts.
“For the Son of man came to seek and to save that which was lost.”
Luke 19:10
As you may be trying to locate Him, He is already locating you.
I don’t know where you are, how lost you feel, who or what you have lost, but He knows your location, in every way.
“You know...”
“O Elohim, You have searched me
and known me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
You understand my thoughts from afar.
You search out my path and my lying down;
You are aware of all my ways.
Even before a word is on my tongue,
You know all about it, O LORD.
You hem me in behind and before;
You have laid Your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go to escape Your Spirit?
Where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend to the heavens, You are there;
if I make my bed in Sheol, You are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle by the farthest sea,
even there Your hand will guide me;
Your right hand will hold me fast.
If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me,
and the light become night around me”—
even the darkness is not dark to You,
but the night shines like the day,
for darkness is as light to You.
For You formed my inmost being;
You knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise You,
for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Marvelous are Your works,
and I know this very well.
My frame was not hidden from You
when I was made in secret,
when I was woven together
in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all my days were written in Your book
and ordained for me
before one of them came to be.
How precious to me are Your thoughts, O Elohim,
how vast is their sum!
If I were to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand;
and when I awake,
I am still with You.
Psalm 139:1-18
You may hear the scripture repeated a lot today:
“He is not here. He is arisen.”
What does that mean to you?
He is “cut out” of the very death trap that tried to permanently kill Him. And failed.
Look again…
What do you see?
Where are you?
Let’s pray.
ABBA-
I come to You right now, in The Name of Your Son, My Savior, Yahshua.
You know where I am.
And You know how I feel like I have stumbled or fallen, not arisen.
You know how lost I feel right now.
Forgive me of my sins.
Locate me. Help me. Love me. Comfort me.
You know how to reach me.
Come find me.
Thank You that yes, “He is arisen.”
Show me what that means for my life right now.
Do what I cannot do for myself.
I need You.
I need Your Help in my life.
Help me. Guide me.
Thank You.
Amen.
Have a blessed, life-changing, miraculous Resurrection Sunday!
Copyright © 2026 by Sheryle Cruse
Attention Getting
