Impulse Buy

“For whatever is hidden is meant to be disclosed, and whatever is concealed is meant to be brought out into the open.”

Mark 4:22

At the height of my Anorexia, years ago, my “normal” routine consisted of hours of exercise on a bike, trampoline, with hand weights and thousands of daily sit-ups.

And one other thing…

Milk of Magnesia.

Once, as I was standing in line at a drugstore, I was quite conspicuous. I was at a two-digit weight, at nineteen, and had one item in my bony hands.

Only one thing.

The telltale blue bottle of Milk of Magnesia was not fooling anyone.

I know this, as the people in the drugstore and the cashier looked at me with concern/horror/disgust.

There was no hiding. There was no downplaying. There was no passing it off as normal. It wasn’t like I was buying shampoo or a magazine.

And there was no add-on, “impulse buy” of gum or mints.

No.

One thing.

Only one conspicuous blue thing…with laxative properties.

One thing that prompted such shame and fear.

I was caught in the truth of what I had become with eating disorders. There was no passing it off as anything else.

“For whatever is hidden is meant to be disclosed, and whatever is concealed is meant to be brought out into the open.”

Mark 4:22

So, now, I’m telling on myself.

This ugly reality happened.

It wasn’t pretty. It wasn’t glamorous. It wasn’t healthy.

“You’re as sick as your secrets.”

We all have this going on in our lives.

Some of us may not deal with eating disorders or other vices.

But there is some kind of secret shame, something we wish no one would ever know about.

And we certainly don’t want other people to look at us.

Eye contact can trap us in exposure.

We are seen. We are known.

And there’s nothing we can do to undo that.

Terror can result, naturally, in each of us at that prospect.

“And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

John 8:32

What are we lying about and hiding?

What are we downplaying, minimizing, covering up?

What are we afraid will happen if our secret gets out?

 

Yahshua died for each of these secretive “impulse buys” of shame, disease, death, and sin.

Each of our secret sins were already paid for by His atoning Work on The Cross.

Let’s turn TO Him and Pray For His Loving Help and Healing right now.

 

Abba Father-

We come to You in The Name of Your Sinless Son, Yahshua.

We ask that, from this point on, He be in complete control of our lives.

We accept that He paid the price for us, in all our shame-filled secret sins.

Forgive us.

Help us.

We receive Your living Truth to touch and intervene with our secretive lies, whatever they may be.

We cannot pass off anything as an “impulse buy.”

We have bought sin.

Thank You, however, that You, through the Redemptive Blood of Your Son, Yahshua Ha-Mashiach, have bought us back from death.

We receive it, in His Name, right now,

Amen.

 

Copyright © 2025 by Sheryle Cruse